It's /tg/ - what do you think mate?

>All Those Failures

What are your stats? And what kind of DCs is he setting? Seems odd a Rogue couldn't at least steal something without being caught. Are did you just roll really poorly?

>>24398465

For a while though, at least with the stealing, the dice were on my side. But I kinda deserved to get caught, I was stealing from someone in the middle of a crowd, a big line.

And then the dice took against me.

>>24398393

So Veliss makes a break for the city walls.

> apparently I word traveled faster than my (beautiful, shapely) legs could carry me because a guard stops me at the gate and inspects me closely, saying he heard something about an elf causing trouble in the marketplace.
> I lie and try to say I'm carrying an important message for my master who lives just outside the city, but because I have no local area knowledge and I fail the bluff and the brutish human guard seizes me and starts dragging me away from the gate.
> He's dragged me some distance before I manage to break free and make a desperate sprint for the gate but I gave him combat advantage
>Chasing me, right on my heels, he swung his halberd and sends me sprawling into the dirt.
>DM gets a strange look on his face, a sort of horrified glee, the former not looking so genuine.
> The gate is ridiculously close at this point- if I had been outside of his reach, I could have run and made it out. So I struggle to stand, draw my sword and slash at him, and don't really do much damage.
> the guard swings his halberd at me and I get knocked unconscious.
>DM shrugs. He said he "hadn't realized" how not ready my level 1 rogue was for that encounter- apparently the guard had a hefty bonus to attack.
> I wake up in prison garb in jail. Veliss is quite distressed at having been knocked out because Eladrin (thanks to Trance) aren't often "not awake" and she's disgusted and furious that her items were taken and she was stripped.
> DM makes bad joke that ANYTHING could have happened to her while she was unconscious. I bash him with the player's handbook until he relents.
> Then I start trying to figure out what I'm going to do next.

>>24398983

Heh - my first roleplay session involved 1890s Call of Cthulhu session that had a character with Dwarfism.
Now; this sessions was the first ever we had and nobody read the rules...see where this is going?

>Meet the characters; Upper-Class Ancestor of guy who invented the toilet, an already mad Sorcerer with multiple personalities (and by using spells gained sanity), an airship captain, and the Working-Class Dwarf.
>Captain (NPC) tags along with Noble. They buy supplies.
>Dwarf and sorcerer go to a bar and the dwarf gets shitfaced.
>Sorcerer sells all of the dwarf's belongings and keeps his battleaxe (don't know why he had that...). Decides to shove it up the dwarf's ass...
>After moving on; all characters gather together to return to lodgings. Their in White Chapel at the moment; cue ruffians.
>Ruffians ask for money - flash knives. Noble pulls out shotgun and lets off both barrels; missing twice.
>Sound draws attention to a Police Officer, who turns the corner to see a man shooting recklessly at a group of people (who obviously look like thieves).
>I inform the players thusly. Noble says "Good - the copper will scare them off even if my double-tap didn't."
>Officer runs up to Noble, pulling out truncheon and blowing on his whistle, and critically hits the noble over the head.
>Guy now knocked out; Ruffians have scattered; remaining characters have their hands up...

It went downhill from there; and looking back now...well.

My first DnD had the party run into a Wererat and I regrettably used OOC knowledge (my eyes widened and I said "Oh fuck...") at the time. We silvered our weapons and killed him, then routed out a nest of thieves.
My Rogue has 9 Wisdom and when he talks, he usually says the wrong thing (has his foot in his mouth). Makes for interesting encounters, a few NPCs don't like me, and I had to pay out the ass for a room once. Doesn't help the party that I take turns with the Cleric to do be the face.

>>24399260

Heh - not ancestor, descendant.

File: 1366648713525.gif-(63 KB, 317x343, brrrgh.gif)

63 KB GIF

>>24398393
>How did you fare in your first D&D game?

Easily because I was an RPG Expert (played over 2 RPGs) before I ever saw D&D. I spent most of my first game thinking the other players were a bunch of children, since they used miniatures and grids and even back in 1989 I knew that the pros don't use those.

>>24398983

There's not much in the cell. A chamber pot, a bowl of food. No windows. My cell seems to be at the end of a long hallway, facing a bare wall.

>still fuming from the abuse of her person, Veliss "sleeps" for four hours and keeps track of how often the guard does his rounds.
>when I "wake up" it seems that the guard hasn't come back as he should have on schedule.
>thinking it can't mean anything good, I grab a wooden bowl and consider grabbing the empty chamber pot but reconsider.
>After making sure a last time there's no other way out, I fey step outside the cell door.
> If the guards had known the difference between Eladrin and Elves, they probably wouldn't have put me in that kind of cell.
> There aren't any other prisoners in my hallway so I continue until I get to the end of it, where I find my guard, asleep in a chair.
>successfully steal a ring of keys off of him, put bowl under his chair (have to get rid of it) and also manage to take his halberd. If worst comes to worst, I can flail pathetically with it.
> continue on down a hallway without any cells come to a fork, go left. There are doors on each side of the hallway, no windows.
> I quietly open one door and see a man at a desk turned towards the opposite wall. Close the door and move to the next one- I'm looking for my stuff.
> Next door has a chest and some wall weapon mounts holding two short swords, a crossbow and some ammo. Discard halberd, grab swords and crossbow/ammo and open chest, which is empty except for a handful of writs of passage.
> apparently, the guards are using the crises at the nearby manor to make some profit off it by selling writs. I steal them, thinking if I can't get my stuff back I could maybe sell these if I escape.
> Then I hear rapidly approaching footsteps.
> DM's face: ^_____^

>>24399345

I look around but there's nowhere to hide. The room is quite empty save the chest so I stand just behind where the door would open.

>guard comes in, opening door all the way so i'm shielded behind it. Sees the items are missing from the walls but doesn't seem very bothered by it. Heads straight for the chest and opens it up, looking confused to find it empty.
>then guard goes out into hallway, goes to the first room I passed and talks to the man in there. "You said you had the writs for me." - "I did, they're in the chest" - "no they aren't", etc...
> I dart over to the chest and replace the writs, pushing them back into a corner, but before I can do much more than that I hear a pair of footsteps approaching. Hide behind door again.
> Men enter, find the writs, and while they're joking about how one of them needs to stop drinking on the job, I roll to stealthily slip out around the door and into the hallway.
> roll a natural 20.
> DM's annoyed. The guards had no clue.
> I run back to the fork in the hallway and go right, after a few minutes go down a long, bare hallway with tons of barred windows. I can see that the jail has a wall around it, but much further than that, I can't tell what side of the city I'm on or how close to the city wall I am.
> quietly open one of the large double doors, ahead of me, marveling at my luck that there haven't been many guards up to this point, then see two of them sitting next to a window at a table playing cards. To my right, there is a second door.
> Stumped for a bit. At this point, Veliss would rather take her chances Fey Stepping outside and falling however many feet it was to the ground but she can't, hasn't had a rest.
> Then I get an idea. I load the crossbow, aim for the window and fire.

File: 1366651023373.jpg-(59 KB, 750x600, cube.jpg)

59 KB JPG

>Be awkward 13 year old
>Get invited to D&D session by fellow awkward 13 year olds at middle school lunch
>HOLY SHIT, SOCIAL INTERACTION
>I come to play Friday after school
>Not sure what will happen, I've only heard stereotypical things about D&D
>Decide to roll up a babby's first human fighter
>Wield a glaive because POLEARMS, FUCK YEA
>We're playing in a group of around 8 people, but I'm still excited
>First encounter is a Beholder
>HOLY SHIT, SOMEBODY DIED
>We manage to beat it, move on
>We infiltrate a stronghold filled with goblins and ogres
>I've got javelins, nickel-and-dining thigs to death.
>Party picks a fight with two Ogre Mages
>Party is dropping, I somehow face the ogre mass alone.
>Decide to be a fucking hero, pick up two of my teammates' swords and bring it
>Get told I'm taking -4 to each swing, don't care
>I Crit one OM, everybody cheers
>Cheering cut short when the other OM downs me

That was ten years ago, and is still among the most fun I've had playing 3.5

>>24399533

That ended their card game, to be sure. They jump up look out the window, thinking someone was throwing things from outside.

> roll to sneak through the door on the right and succeed.
> I find myself in a small empty courtyard, with two guards way ahead of me on the walls. They don't notice me. It's night and dark.
> I'm desperate to flee, belongings be damned, but the only way out is through the gate on the far wall, and I'd have to pass the men there.
> on my right is another pair of doors. I sneak inside and find my belongings stacked in a corner. There isn't much else in the room, indicating that there aren't many other prisoners in jail presently, but I do find some vials containing an unknown red liquid and some coins so I take them, suit up and open the door a crack because there's a disturbance outside.
> Two guards run over to where the other two on the wall are- apparently my escape has been discovered.
> While they're occupied I successfully sneak back into the room I entered the courtyard from but before I can do more than let out a sigh of relief I hear voices and footsteps from the adjacent hallway.

>>24399698

You know I intend to have my characters captured. I just hope they all don't end up sneaking through the place.
On a lighter note at least they'll meet the two recurring enemy-NPC's I intend to introduce over the course of the campaign.

>>24399698
>>24399676
>>24399533
>>24399345
>>24398983
>>24398393

This is awesome so far!
More?!

>>24398393
>Be <12
>Friend tells me about some kind of board(?) game he played with his brother.
>He was a dwarf.
>He yanked off some guy's balls in a bar fight.
>Ball yanking board game? Totally_Radical!.jpg
>Hassle friend's cooler, older brother to let me play
>Play game
>Be elf
>Named Stridor, just like my HeroQuest character
>No board? You mean I have to use my imagination?
>Obsessed with outdoing friend's ball yanking bar fight antics
>Session ends, HighFive.jpg
>Don't play for weeks, constantly pester friend's older brother for rematch. Probably turned off by our bizarre testicular tortion obsession
>Finally relents, offers to run Champions
>Super Heroes!
>Play Shadow Hawk, comic character I know nothing about told he has powersuit, boomerang blade and breaks criminal's backs
>Friend plays OC TeleKinetic limited to sharp objects
>Investigate drugs at the docks, JustSayNoToDrugs.jpg
>Friend constantly hijacks my sweet Hawk Talon to kill criminals
>Not satisfied with simply breaking backs and leaving criminals paraplegic, 2edgy4u Shadow Hawk breaks necks leaving criminals QUADraplegic
>Session ends
>Obsess about game for weeks, constantly pester friend's brother, I'mTooOldForThisShit.jpg, gives us some books to keep us out of his hair and tells us to have fun
>TMNT&OS! Cowabunga.jpg

>>24400033
>Make many characters, never actually play
>Buy Dungeoneer, the Fighting Fantasy RPG, eventually run games for circle of fellow friends
>Buy D&D rules cyclopedia, Can'tStopMeKnow.jpg run ever more elaborate mediocre games for circle of fellow friends.
>Lifelong nerd, haven't lovingly described elven hands sterilizing bar fly's in over 20 years.

Can't remember much about the first campaign I ran, but I was obsessed with the Seven Samurai/Magnificent Seven plots- arming bandit plagued villager's to defend themselves. (No doubt thanks to the Three Amigos)

>>24399698

Again, there's not much in the room except the table and overturned chairs and a lot of broken glass, not much to hide behind.

>I leap across the room, overturning the table and crouching behind it and roll for stealth.
>I succeed.
>A group of guards go through the room and just head straight out into the courtyard.
>The second they're gone I go to the window. It isn't barred like the others and squeeze out through it, cutting myself and fall to the ground.
>Outside, I head straight for the prison wall succeed at climbing it without notice (just barely managed to avoid some guards) and fail at an elegant descent on the other side and fall, doing myself some damage.
>get seen by some startled people but run across the street towards some houses, yelling over my shoulder that I'm acting- hoping they'll be so confused by the statement that they won't immediately yell for the guards.
> run some more and climb up onto some rooftops to see where the heck I am. There's a large, flat grassy area ahead of me with some more houses in the distance and I can see the city walls off to the left.
> I head towards the city walls, not wanting to run across an empty field. Alarm has been raised and the guards are running around kicking over trash cans and kicking hoboes in the alleyways.
>Because no one ever seems to look up, I keep running and jumping across rooftops, occasionally failing or slipping and making some noise but there's not that many people out on the streets at this hour so my screw ups don't end me.
>I finally get as close as I can to the outer wall and climb down in a cramped space between two house.
> There's a pair of guards at the gate. I wait till one jogs down the street, probably curious about all the commotion. Then I approach the final guard.
> "It's past curfew, where do you think you're going?"
>Me: Oh, the most devout elven people always go out during this hour, to sit and meditate at the center of a copse of trees. Roll for bluff.

>>24398393
Well, my first D&D campaign was... interesting:
> we had an all drow party, set in Menzoberranzan. All of us started out as relatively high ranking members of one of the noble houses, working our ways up through the ranks in the usual drow fashion: Blackmail, backstabbing, lying through our teeth, etc.
> I was a female cleric of Lolth, and one of the first things I did was I framed the Eldest son of worshipping a god that WASN'T Lolth, because Lolth told me to.
> At some point, got voluntarily turned into a Drider, because our house considered them holy.
> Eventually, both of our house's Matron Mothers (yes, we had 2) died, and my character should have been made the new Matron Mother (being the highest ranked cleric). But Instead, the male spymaster of the house, who was also a PC, took the position instead as the Patron Father. it kind of helped that our houses Draegloth (Also a PC) backed him up.
> Obviously, my female drow would not let such an insult go, but couldn't do anything about it openly, since the Insanely strong Draegloth would have slaughtered her.
> Instead, she meets up with the Matron Mother of one of the other 8 main houses, and puts out a hit on the new "Patron Father".
> the hit almost succeeds, but he survived because the DM's dice loved him.
> He eventually figures out that it was I who put the hit on him, but instead of killing me, he paralyzes me so he can put a magical tattoo on me that makes me obedient to his character in ways that wouldn't make it obvious that I was under his control.
> After basically razing all the houses above us to the ground in 1 day, Patron Father faces Lolth, who came to the mortal realm because of all the chaos.
> He kills her with a Major Artifact sword designed specifically to kill her, and becomes the new Lolth.
> My character ends the game as the new Spider Pope of the Drow People.

It was a fun game

>>24400091
OH GOD MOAR

>>24400091

Success. Which is great because the last time I fought a guard it didn't go well. So I head for the nearest stand of tree and the second I'm out of sight I break into and I don't stop moving till the sun comes up.

So I can't go back to that town again cause I stabbed a guy, destroyed a lot of property, and broke out of jail, so I probably have a bounty on my head. Great! I was all set to call an end to the game for the day, but the DM wanted to keep going.

> walk for a few more hours (east?) of the city until I come to a little settlement with a huge manor house at the head of it. Everything is a little quiet.
>Keeping a good distance from the house, I lay down in a field of tall grass as go to sleep.
> notice a lizard creature approaching in the grass after a little while. I get up and he sees me, lets out a screech and starts running for the house.
> I chase after him, wanting to keep him from getting reinforcements, probably a little angry at being disturbed.
>A second one shows up before we exit the field and a fight ensues.
> I manage to get some good hits on them but two on one is doing me some serious damage. I'm thinking I should run for it when I remember the glass vials I'd taken from the Prisoner Belongings room.
> I hadn't been able to identify them, and I wasn't about to drink them. So I throw one at one of the lizard-men.
>lizard man obliges me by being set on fire, as does a good amount of the field. He starts making the most horrid screams and wails and throws himself on the ground, and startling his lizard friend.
> manage to kill the not-burning lizard and leave the burning one burning.
> doesn't seem like any more lizard things will rush out to attack. Consider running away. >Then consider that the house looks pretty nice and that the rich bastards might have left some stuff in their hurry.

>>24400279
And he was probably way better at it than Lloth

>>24400672
well, he did have a conscience, so the drow people were sorta heading towards becoming good. that is until his character started fighting with a lesser gods, because according to the DM, fighting between the gods is a big no-no, so the god of gods was apparently going to come down and strip him of his powers and give them to someone else.
I would assume it would have been me, but we ended it after that was revealed. A pity to, because I was planning on becoming a lich with a ton of tattoos and ioen stones embedded in her. ah, what could have been

>>24400642

The field near the house is on fire and rapidly spreading and threatens to destroy the whole property. So instead of leaving conflagration in progress, I go into the house searching for things to steal.

> two more lizard people appear. I wonder if it was the smell of smoke or the screams of their fellow that drew them.
>I fight one of them up the stairs, then fey step up the steps and kick the one at the top down the steps. But they quickly collect themselves and the two on one fight continues.
> I start missing a lot of attacks. Try throwing the last red vial.
> It breaks at the lizard man's feet, not doing much damage but sets the house on fire.
> I'm bloodied and wondering if they'll spare my life if I offer to take up some sort of perverted sexual service, but they don't speak common and then I finally start landing some blows.
> Finally kill both of them, stomp out the indoor fire and go through the surprisingly few rooms of the "manor".
> find some notes of credit, some small coins, and a pick the lock of a chest and pull out a gold necklace with a huge ruby on it.
> Veliss is so happy she nearly cries and immediately forgets how awful the last day and a half was- she likes jewelery, especially gorgeous, expensive necklaces
> Outside, the fire is still spreading and getting very close to the house, so she goes to one of the last rooms and quietly opens the door.
> there's someone inside.

>a BIT selfish and vain
>steals everything not nailed down, burns down someones house

>>24400968
I see nothing wrong there.

She had a shit day.

>>24400852

My first thought is to leave him. He's tied up and bound to the floor, not facing my direction. I have a pretty necklace, his imminent smoke inhalation/crispy death is none my concern.

>Then I decide against it. With a little work I can go from thieving marauder to hero and get paid for it.
> first I run outside and bury the necklace and notes and coins a good distance away from the fire.
> Then I return to the manor and free the man, who turned out to be Lord Dannon's seneschal.
> he thanks me and tells me that the lizard men attacked the place and all the residents fled to the nearby town, where the gov'nor there was letting them all in with writs of passage because Lord Dannon has a bit of influence. Then the horde of lizard men moved on leaving just a few to try and hold the place.
> I tell him that thanks and payment for my noble deeds can wait- that the lizard people set fire to the field and if we don't put it out there will only be ashes where the house used to stand.
> together we put out the fire. After checking the property to make sure there's no others lizard people left, he tells me he'll go to the town (the one I had just escaped from on the previous day) and get reinforcements and Lord Dannon.
> I decide to go with him (decided against waiting there because it'd be easier to blame me for the missing stuff if I'm alone there for a day and a half).
> just outside the city, I stop him and say that I have a confession to make.

>>24398393
Nearly 30 years ago for me. The PCs spent a lot of time traveling through wilderness, set up camp, got drunk, and threw horse shit at each other.
>We were supposed to be playing this nifty new module the DM had bought. Ravenloft probably wasn't the best choice for our group.

>>24398393
A game with my family, D&D 3.5, starting at level... I want to say 5, but I'm not sure. My brother was DMing, and I was going with a character that I tried my hardest to minmax as much as possible. Ended up with a wizard with Ocular Eyes, Scorching Ray, and Create Construct. Basically let me kill a boss in a single blast of FIRE LASER EYES a few times a day, but my father went with the idea to go with a troll barbarian. he was immortal, did incredible damage with his claws, and with a bit of math, he was apparently able to just peel through stone walls with his bare hands.

We ended up going into the ruins of a castle- now a necromancer's fortress- and killing lots of undead.

And during another session, damage substitution turned my FIRE LASER EYES into SONIC LASER EYES and took care of a very small red dragon... who, with a couple cows, I tried to make into a meat golem. It ended up being able to breathe fire, but I got negative modifiers for spellcasting after I made it a stand for my wizard to sit on his back.

>>24401128

Confession time.

> I tell him that I am only 15 years old and that was kidnapped from the Feywild and broke free of my captors on this and wandered into the town ahead of us day before yesterday.
> I go on to say that There was a dreadful incident in marketplace- someone thought I was trying to steal from them, like a girl such as myself would ever do such a thing and the crowd closed in on me.
> I explained that I was Unused to human company, and thinking they were going to kill me, I panicked and broke free, possibly damaging someone in the process.
> I then explained that the guards captured me and refused to hear my words, cruelly abused me and locked me away in prison and that I had been nearly enmaddened by fear and confinement and had escaped.
> as a result, I would not be so welcome in town I thought, and asked if he thought lord dannon could be of any assistance in this terrible misunderstanding.
> roll for bluff.

>>24401681
NAT 1 C'MON NAT ONE

OR BETTER, NAT 20 AND HE RAPES YOU C'MON

>>24401681

I don't remember exactly what I rolled but it was enough.

> the lord's man looks moved by my story and assures me that he will explain it all to LD, that he will be discreet and that LD wields a lot of influence in this town.
> He goes down the road into town. I lurk in the nearest stand of trees- it's late afternoon, going on evening. I successfully climb a tree and doze in it all night.
> I contemplate making a run for it- I'd have a head start back to the manor, could pick up my necklace and vanish, but I decide to wait and see what happens.
> after some more time passes, LD and his seneschal, in addition to some men wearing LD's colors approach and I go out to meet them, stopping at a safe distance.
> LD thanks me for saving his seneschal and tells me that we will all return to his manor to survey the damages.
> He's a bit dismayed at the sight of the burnt field, and goes with some men into the house to make sure there's no more lizard people.
> on his return he thanks, me stating that will send word to the gov'nor to absolve me of my crimes and that if there's anything I need, he will do his best to assist me.
> I curtsy demurely and state that a horse would be nice for traveling these long, hard roads and that any monetary assistance would be greatly appreciated.
> spend the next few days at the manor lapping up all the courtesies extended to me as the -savior- of the manor, eating and drinking what I want and making myself scarce whenever there was work to be done.
>finally, LD provides me with a horse and tells me that if I am still around in a years time, to return and see how they have rebuilt.
>I nod noncommittally and leave at dusk, stopping when it is all clear at the edge of the property to retrieve my prize necklace and the notes of credit.

>>24402149
nice read

>>24402149

What alignment is our nice, little Rogue?

>>24402149


So that was that. We both messed a lot of things up- he didn't remind me about action points, which would have been massively useful, and by rights the jail should have had more guards in it to kick my lying, stealing, stabbing-random-people ass.

The guy I stabbed survived but had to live with a massive scar and forever after harbored a deep hatred of elves.

I went off looking for another town to sell the pretty necklace and perhaps pick up some new shiny things.

The second campaign wasn't as long, I've been failing a lot at the rolls though, which has lead to some interesting developments.

>>24402355

I wrote down that she's neutral.

>>24402462

So fourth edition I take it? With just the whole "Good, Neutral, Chaotic" thang. She seems a little Chaotic Neutral; maybe tending towards evil with all that stealing and such.
Sounds like you had good times.

Cap-a-ma-jig: capnsup the

>>24402604

Yeah, 4th edition. She's definitely a little bit evil.

I was a bit bothered by the simple Good Neutral, Chaotic thing because I felt it wasn't descriptive enough, but at the end of the day I felt it's just a tl;dr label for the character's place on the ruler of morality.

>>24402718

Well, I play a Lawful Neutral Rogue in 3.5 - and I play up the whole "moral code/code of conduct/code of laws/contract" quite a lot.
Since I open locks and disarm traps I have a contract with the party to have first choice in what to pick from the treasure chest/s - Yes, it is actually written up irl. I also have a contract with my In-Character friend that if he uses an evil axe he got for evil then he must be rid of said axe (yet again; irl contract).

And when I give my word - I get the job done.

OP, how did it go with you and the DM being one on one? Anything that you felt was good/bad about it? Or anything you learnt to make it work better? I might be GMing for one soon, would love any advice.

And thanks for storytime.

File: 1366664499039.jpg-(5 KB, 256x273, Descartes[1].jpg)

5 KB JPG

>>24402718
There's only one way to fix precociously evil elf chicks

My DM put me on the spot, considering I knew NOTHING about the events transpiring up to me joining the group, so I got introduced very abruptly.

>"You are all sitting around drinking various things after your victory over the necromancer, when all of a sudden a dragonborn warlord enters the tavern and walks up to your table and says..."
>Group looks at me
>"Uh, Hi?"
>Don't even know why I am here in the tavern
>After initial confusion, end up going to find some sheep, paint a house poorly and kill some bandits.

File: 1366665521799.jpg-(144 KB, 629x838, spellwarped-ettin[1].jpg)

144 KB JPG

I had just learned the basics of thac0 and rolled up a half-elven fighter/thief. I'm pretty sure I was trying to save a princess, and I think I fought an Ettin. Or maybe the princess was an Ettin, I don't remember.

>>24403363
>ettin princess
Goddamnit, now I need to make a campaign revolving around one.

I was an elven wiz,.and our rogue died before the first fight.

>>24403403
You know you're off to a good start when a party member dies even before the combat starts!

>>24403449
He tried to clime a rotten rope, above a campfire.

File: 1366666292544.gif-(1.74 MB, 177x150, 1359054219188.gif)

1.74 MB GIF

>>24403488
>mfw
What kind of thought process does this rogue possess?

>>24403627
Probably something along the lines of "OH SHIT IT HURTS" there at the end.

>>24403627
He's That Guy. Killed the Mayor's kids next campaign, by burning down a goblin camp.

>>24403024

I think it worked out quite well, since we were just getting a hang on things. One on one lets the DM focus their attention on one player character, and can adjust the story without worrying about what 3 or 4 other people might be doing to screw the situation up.

If we could do it over, we would start at level 3 because EVERYTHING is like fighting a god at level one.

bump!

>>24408014
bump

>>24402462

Tales from campaign two:

< (DM fail) he wanted me to have to fight a pack of rage drakes, but when Veliss came upon the first one, he didn't take into account her love of animals, so she kept throwing them trail rations and tried to befriend them. Instead of being savaged by the lot of them, they fought each other over the food and she left them when I got bored.

> in the next town, demonstrate remarkable self-restraint, do not rob any (well, only a few people). At this point DM had looked at the currency chart and was no longer coughing up gold coins like pennies at a coinstar machine
> pay a shop lady handsomely to forget I was ever here and lend me the use of her back room for the day- then buy some fine clothes, makeup and some dyes.
> my cinnamon-skinned, white haired, vagabond looking eladrin leaves the shop several shades lighter with black braided hair covering her ears and in noblewoman's dress.
>sell the gold necklace with massive ruby to the jewellery vendor, convince him that I'm Lady Dannon's wife selling a family heirloom to make money to help an impoverished member of the family that's recently come under dire straits.
> back at the shop, the lady winks at me as I enter- she thinks I just met up with a lover.
> I show amazing self-restraint by not burning down anyone's house or pickpocketing anyone else- then again, it was probably just that I was enjoying pretending to be a noble.
>later that night, leave inn, go to the noble quarter, looking to do a B&E. A low wall surrounds the ritzy area.
> fail the rather arbitrary athletic check and fall flat on my ass. Nearest guard approaches, hearing some kind of sound.

>>24409781

Not being able to bear the laugh of the DM or the embarrassment at possibly failing to climb over a low wall a second time, I fey step past the insurmountable obstacle and keep moving.

> pick a house at random, sneak around to the back of the house, find a dog asleep at the back door.
> Veliss carefully weighs her love of animals against her love of coins, shiny things and the thrill of taking and trespassing.
>I draw my sword and successfully sneak right up to the dog.
> roll for attack.
> roll a one.
> ... consider stopping the game to try and end the shame, but ultimately decide against it.
> So I miss the dog completely and it wakes up.
> I get to attack again thankfully before the dog could bark and decapitate it in one swing.
> the head was knocked several feet away by the momentum of my attack, I retrieve it and place it back where it would have been if the dog was still asleep and not decapitated, in case someone happens to look out one of the back windows.

>>24398393
Let me tell you tell you about my first session today, OP, and how it turned into an episode of "I Shouldn't Be Alive".

But first, a little backstory on my character:

>I'm playing a female Longtooth Shifter Ranger named Glacia. She's kind and naive and not too bright. She's the daughter of two Shifter Druids of exceptional power but she not only lacks magical talent, she's incapable of it entirely. Instead, she seems to constantly have horrible headaches when she overexerts herself.
>Her parents are disappointed but don't throw her away or anything. Instead, they encourage her to do something she IS good at, which happens to be swordplay.
>When Glacia is 14, her parents have a second daughter, Crystal, who happens to be gifted with magic. She doesn't seem to have any more than average talent, but its more than enough for her to be chosen as heir. Her parents don't say this, but Glacia knows that she can't succeed their position without magic.
>By 16 she's better at swordplay than most of her clan (which by majority are magic users). They get someone from another clan (a Razorclaw Shifter) to agree to mentor her. He trains her for the next three years during which she officially chooses to be a Ranger like him. She develops feelings for him during their time together but never musters the courage to tell him outside of awkwardly hinting at it.
>So Glacia is now 19, and with another two years left to finish her training, her mentor receives a message from a member of his clan and makes plans to leave immediately without telling Glacia why. He tells her that their training is on “semi-permanent hold” and instructs her to return to her pack. Glacia demands he take her with him and she’ll help anyway she can and he gets angry and tells her off.
>After an argument, he leaves her and goes on his way. Glacia tries to find her way back north to her pack before considering she doesn’t want to face the disappointment of her parents. So she follows him.

>>24410009

So I successfully break into the house and start snooping around.

>First found a wine cellar. Picked up a few of the oldest wines, tasting a bit of each to make sure I like it before secreting it on my person.
> didn't find much else worthy of note on the first floor. I'm in the middle of the dining room when I hear light footsteps and a little voice calling someone's name.
>successfully hide under the table. See a child enter the room and look around.
> Veliss curses her luck- she'd wanted to get upstairs where there would probably be rings and necklaces and sacks full of coin- if she'd wanted wine, she would have broken into the winery.
> I don't want to leave, but killing a child seemed like soooo much gruesome effort- where would I put the body, how could I kill it without causing a mess, someone might notice that it was gone from its bedchamber...
> wait until child moves into the kitchen before going through an adjacent doorway and up the staircase.
> snoop through rooms and end up in the closet when I hear the child coming back upstairs.
> rifle through some of the coats and find a rather incriminating letter to a lover from the lady of the house.
> pocket it for blackmail purposes.
> about to exit closet when there's a commotion outside and every person in the house runs downstairs.
> I peek out the window- there's something in the sky that has everyone and their great grandmother standing around in their nightgowns and hair curlers.
>quickly ransack the master bedroom, finding a bit less loot than I was expecting. I have a pout, then quietly trash the place.

Part 1: In which Glacia begins her quest to find her mentor.

>So I travel for a bit, wondering where to go. I’m not sure where exactly my master went so I end up deciding to try and contact his clan. As I’m traveling, it starts to rain pretty hard.
>As I trying to navigate her way down a cliffside, the ground starts to shake. Nothing big, but definitely noticeable. I wait for a moment and look around, but doesn’t see or hear anything out of the ordinary so I keeps going.
>I reach the bottom and begin to walk through the undergrowth when the ground shakes again and half the cliff face behind me breaks off and rolls down toward me in a mudslide. Naturally, I start to running for my life but the mudslide catches up to me and carries me off downhill.
>I get bashed against rocks and trees and nearly half drown in the mud. I ask the DM if I can roll to catch a tree on the way by. I succeed. However, I have to roll to maintain my hold on the tree. Of course, I fail. So I get dragged along by the flow again until it brings me to a stop hundreds of feet away.
>Dragging myself out of the muck, I try and find out just where the hell I am. After not finding anything of note (not even a trail) for an hour or so, I decide to climb a tree to get a better view. Just as I leap to grab a branch, something wraps around my leg. I look down to see a mass of vines with a rather large (and eyeless) head staring(?) directly at me. I fail the check (despite my high bonus) to hold on to the branch and get thrown to the forest floor.
>Not seeing how I’m going to get out of this other than fighting, I draw my swords and roll for initiative. I get to go first so I go at the vines with everything I can manage, dealing 20+ damage in the first turn. When I can get far enough away, I try and identify it and recall my mentor making some jokes about bloodthorn vines.
>The bloodthorn vine shoots thorns in my arm while I continue to hack off its limbs one by one with my twin shortswords.

Part 2: In which Glacia makes the first kill of the session and stares down some Lizardmen

>I end up bloodied but manage to cripple the Bloodthorn vine with repeated attacks. The poor creature tries to limp away but I’m more than little upset today between the argument with master, the mudslide, and now this upstart vine covered monstrosity. So I drive both swords through its body, killing it. Afterwards I feel a little bad about the needless force but a little better about being able to put what I’ve been taught to good use. Deciding to show it to master when I met up with him again, I cut off its head and hung it up to drain before climbing the tree to try and get a fix on my location.
>I can see the cliff I came from a mile or so away and a small clearing with a body of water much closer by. I climb back down, retrieve the bloodless Bloodthorn head and head off (hah) in the direction of the water.
>I arrive at the clearing and find a large pond. Ecstatic, I begin gathering what dry wood I can find in order to start a campfire. After the fire is started, I eat a quick meal, strip, then begin trying to scrub the Bloodthorn ichor from my gear. When I’m satisfied with how my stuff looks, I throw them back to shore and wade out further so I can clean my skin.
>Naturally, a knife juts out of the water directly in front of me, cutting my arm. I back up as far as possible and a Lizardman surfaces and starts gibbering at me. I raise my hands in peace and try to slowly and calmly back away to the shore, more than a little nervous that I could be entering into combat (literally) naked.
>Two more Lizardman surface as I reach the shore and I struggle to put some clothes on while I keep an eye on them. The two new Lizardmen argue with each other and make loud hissing noises at me but the first one just watches.
>I gather my stuff and back away into the forest. So now my clothes are wet again and I lost the fire I had worked hard to prepare. I end up sleeping in a tree.

Part 3: In which Glacia shouldn’t be alive

>So I wake up stiff and sore with a headache but otherwise not too bad, so I load up and head out. I arrive at a large open stretch where some obvious cataclysm had at one point destroyed the forest entirely. This one stretch of land has absolutely no trees. The ground is almost sandy in texture and the only landmarks are dozens of boulders and the barely visible line of trees where the forest continued on the other side.
>I make sure my waterskin is filled and decide to try and cross it. At the half way point, I come across a large, open crevasse too wide to jump over. Its pretty deep and I can’t see the bottom. I kick some rocks into it and don’t hear them hit the ground for a pretty long time. Hoping it isn’t the same size all the way across I traveling along it, looking for a narrow point.
>I eventually find it: a tiny ledge around a boulder that crosses the ravine. I decide to make my way across it. DM asks that I check to keep my balance. Okay, no problem, I have decent acrobatics. Critical failure on nat 1. I slip and fall right into the chasm. Ohshit.jpg. >Swinging my arms wildly, I try to catch something, ANYTHING to prevent me from falling to my death. I manage to grab hold of some rock and begin to pull myself up. However, just as I reach the lip at the top, the whole thing crumbles and breaks off (think sandstone) and I fall again. This time, I’m too far away to grab anything and I can’t do much but flail wildly and scream. My thoughts are of my parents and of the last than satisfactory parting with master as I fall.
>I hit something hard, take damage, bounce off, and continue to fall. I hit another ledge, take damage, and the ledge breaks under the impact, causing me to fall some more. I fall another three dozen feet or so and bounce off a boulder before slamming to the ground. I take even more damage.

Part 4: In which Glacia cries for half an hour and then encounters an extradimensional horror

>I try to move and possibly roll over and realize that my left arm won’t move, its possibly broken. I begin to cry. I’ve never been in this much pain in my life before and I don’t know how I’m going to get back up without the use of my left arm. I break down and spend the next half an hour or so crying and sobbing and holding myself.
>DM has a sadistic look on her face, but is overall impressed with the fact that my character doesn’t just shrug it off and jump to her feet like generic fantasy hero #583191151.
>I realize that what little light that filtered through the opening 100 feet above was quickly fading as the sun was no longer directly overhead. I can’t really see, even with my low-light vision, so I dig through my bag with my good arm and try to hold some flint. I manage to light one of my torches. I’m covered in a multitude of bruises and cuts but I manage to get up and even walk.
>I hold the torch as high as I can in my good hand and start down the long corridor at the bottom of the chasm to see what I can find. After a while I notice it starts to get cold. Like, really cold. Unnaturally cold. I look around and see something dark and rippling in the distance. Its pitch black, even under the torch light. Tendrils come out of the pitch black circle, followed by stalks with eyes on them.
>Not being the bravest person, I scream and throw my torch at it. It hits the creature and falls to the ground before coming close to sputtering out. Before the creature can react, I pull one of my sunrods from my pack and throw it on the ground. I draw one of my swords. Tentacle beast considers the sunrod for a moment and then ignores it and heads straight for me. I roll for initiative.

Part 5: In which Glacia attempts to fight an extradimensional horror and then suffers every type of pain imaginable in the process.

>Tentacle beast’s first action is to extend a tendril and touch me with it. I am instantly forced to relive every emotional hurt I have ever had in my life. The disappointment of my parents for not being the child they wanted and overhearing conversations about me from other members of my clan, the pride with which they regarded my little sister, my growing feelings for master and inability to express them properly.
>It almost cripples me instantly and I stagger, partially transforming (Longtooth Shifting) reflexively as I scream. I swing my one good sword arm at it and cut off the offending tendril, but it doesn’t really seem to affect the creature much. With only one arm I realize I can’t make the most of the two sword techniques I’ve learned.
>Tentacle beast touches me again and this time I relive every physical pain I’ve ever suffered. Every cut and scrape and even the pain I felt falling down the crevasse an hour ago all come back in stunning clarity. I start sobbing again.
>I swing wildly at the beast and then limp away, trying to escape. I think I might have gotten away, but another portal opens up in front of me and a tentacle latches on to my foot. I’m panicking now. I don’t want to be touched by this thing ever, ever again. I yank my foot back and drag the creature out of the hole with it.
>After a few more rounds of trading attacks, the creature decides it would be a nice idea to rise in the air and teleport switch places with me. Its floating a dozen feet off the ground. I end up falling but manage to avoid getting hurt even more.
>My character starts suffering from her headaches again at the worst possible time and the creature starts mentally assaulting her again. Her hitpoints drop dangerously low. But when its my turn again, something weird happens. My headaches return.

Part 6: In which Glacia discovers a hidden power, kills the extradimensional horror and then cries some more

>The crushing pain of the headache turns into a rush of energy and suddenly I feel ready to fight again.
>Explanation: (I had multi-classed Glacia into Ardent since Ardents usually discover their powers by accident. Basically backstory-wise, Glacia has no magical powers because her psionic powers had choked them off. But the conflict resulted in her psionic powers becoming stunted before they could develop too. And so she only has one psionic ability: Ardent Surge. And will most likely never gain any more. This worked nicely as I had never used it before this because I was waiting for a moment of extreme mental stress and danger. And before you ask, yes the DM knew about this.)
>I have no idea what happened, but between the sudden rush of energy and my regeneration from shifting, I fight back as hard as I can. I roll a nat 20 and do decent damage for a one handed sword attack. However, DM rolls a nat 20 too so I’m back to being dangerously low for hitpoints.
>DM drops hints that the creature looks like it’s on it’s last legs. So I decide for one last attack instead of using a Second Wind. Finally, the creature falls to the ground, twitching and writhing before going still. I make sure it doesn’t move again before falling to the ground and crying again. Despite having killed it, I can’t get all the images of everything I’d ever done wrong, even memories I wanted buried, out of my head.
>After crying myself to near exhaustion, I take a short rest and get up, pick up my still burning sunrod and keep looking for a way up. I find that the wall becomes so narrow at one point that I might be able to wedge myself in it and shimmy my way up. I put the sunrod in my mouth and begin to try and push myself up.
>After an hour or so of slow, painful work, I make it to the very top. DM asks for an athletics check to throw myself over the top of the ridge.

>>24410620

The rest of it is a bit too boring for words. Reenacting my escape from jail, I open a window and climb out of it, and run for it, as someone discovers the body of the dog.

>I head back to the inn and enjoy some of the wine and try on the jewelery I picked up.

And that's where I last left off with this character.

Part 7 (END): In which Glacia lives to see another day (maybe)

>I roll an 18 and even my injury penalties aren’t enough to entirely suppress my +12 Athletics. I make it over the top and scramble like a madwoman for a dozen feet. When I’m safely away, the edge crumbles away and falls off. I ask the DM if she even had the courtesy to make sure I climbed up on to the opposite side of the crevasse. DM says she “thinks she could give that to me”.
>I drag myself through the sand with my one good hand before passing out from pain and exhaustion. I wake up sometime in the middle of the next day. Can’t move. Still in pain. Sand and dirt crusting all my open wounds, eyes, nose, and mouth.
>From the corner of my eye, I see two shapes approach. A minotaur gets off his warhorse and leans over me. I don’t think I can defend myself anymore. I don’t think I can even talk. He reaches down for me and I moan in protest. He ignores me and unable to stay conscious, I pass out again.

And that’s how my first session went. Sorry if it was a bit long, but since we were having storytime, I thought I’d share. But yeah, basically Glacia was a more or less good person, thrown into a series of situations that wasn’t her fault at all and that quite frankly she didn't deserve. It was reading a Song of Ice and Fire all over again. It was, however, good characterization for her and now both the DM and I are a bit more confident about how the campaign will go from here. So yeah, despite it turning into survival horror, I had a great time with my first session today.

Every d20 group that's tried to include me has fallen apart before the campaign started.

Every non-d20 group has flourished wonderfully.

I think the universe might be trying to tell me something.

>>24410605 (Backstory)
>>24410627 (Part 1)
>>24410644 (Part 2)
>>24410654 (Part 3)
>>24410662 (Part 4)
>>24410676 (Part 5)
>>24410687 (Part 6)
>>24410713 (Part 7)

This post is just to tie the others all together since I didn't account for the character limit in them. Hope you enjoyed it!

My first D&D Game?
Oh, by the gods. I don't recall it.
I think it might have been a D20Modern game, but I cannot remember any details. I have played nearly 5lbs of characters (2.2kg, in sheets) since then. (And yes, I did just use my kitchen scales to measure.)
Damnit, you've got me all nostalgic and slightly mournful at the loss of memory....

It's been a long while since my first campaign. September 1984 in fact.

All I remember is it was 1st edition, I played a wizard, and that character never actually died through the course of it. He ended up becoming a recurring NPC for my campaigns as the years went on, and he still does pop up on occasion.

Just don't ask me to remember my first campaign's details, it was too long ago and I was in 5th grade at the time.

File: 1366691984790.gif-(196 KB, 264x269, I need to think.gif)

196 KB GIF

>>24410737
Holy shit dood. Seriously awesome for a first session. I wish mine went that 'well'.

Then again, your DM sounds both sadistic as shit and brilliant. You've given me much to think on

>>24410737
>>24398393

Fuck all awesome - both of you. Thanks for the story time.

>>24411043
It was awesome, every pain-filled bit. I hope she isn't reading your comment though, I don't want her to get a big head!

>>24411109
I'm glad you enjoyed it as much as I had fun playing it.

donate it to charity

>>24411148
wrong thread?

My first few games of D&D were all the same. Despite literally living next door to a FLGS, my crazy Grandmother thought it was a front for drugs, and my Father working all the goddamn time, and this being after the murder of my Uncle, I was only allowed a couple hours before I had to walk the forty fucking feet from door to door.

So my first three or four sessions I roll up Paladins, focused smiting evil and bringing justice, and every session after I leave, the DM killed my goddamn character. It became a running joke, I was the group's Kenny.

The first character to actually survive was a two headed giant named Bacha-Galoop. No real stories of note with that one until he became an NPC and rode a giant Roc and generally showed up to either a) be a badass, or b) comic relief.

>>24411043

What happened with yours?

I wouldn't call "well" being thrown down a muddy mountainside, being attacked by a plant monster, sleeping soaking wet in a tree to avoid lizard people, falling a hundred feet and managing to kill a floating spaghetti monster with eyes and psychic torment powers, "well"....

Yeah, she didn't die, but the way her luck is, she's probably going to wake up next round while the minotaurs and trying to have their way with her, and she'll end up presenting a half-shifter half minotaur baby to her master when she finally finds him and confesses her love to him, only to learn he's gay and has been having an affair with her father....

>>24411146
You better share more as things go along. I must know how it turns out. GLACIA DESERVES LOVE TOO

>>24411197
>raped by minotaurs
>master is gay
D-Don't even joke like that...

>>24411685
I'll definitely come back and share when we play more. Not sure how much longer until the next session though. We're still working out the details for how we'll play. But yeah, I'm not sure how or even IF Glacia will find her master. And even then there's no guarantee she can win his affection.

If she does find him she'll have one hell of a story. Hell, she might even blame him since she was in his care until she completes her training. If he had escorted her home first, she might not have fell a hundred feet and broken her arm. But maybe what he got called for really was THAT important. We'll find out I guess.

Ah man, my first campaign was 6 it 7 years ago when I was a sophomore in high school. I have many fond memories of balewin the wasted, human monk/drunken master.

really guy who voted -1 in archive? this thread is GOLD.

My first adventure was a bit wonky. Pretty much, I had been interested in playing D&D for quite a while but I never could find a group. My girlfriend had a friend who was willing to DM and have us play. So, our group was a Human Psion (DM's girlfriend), a halfling rogue (my girlfriend, and a human wizard (me). We were playing 3.5
It started off pretty normalish. We went around town looking for some rep-jobs and ended up being hired by a guy who wanted us to investigate some shenanigans in a graveyard. We fight some zombies and notice this odd tower, but seems to be preventing us access. We make a way back to the guy and the session ends there.

Come the second session, there were some party changes. The halfling rogue was now and elf rogue and my human wizard was replaced with a dwarf barbarian...who was confined to a wheelchair. I spoke with the DM about playing as a man in a wheelchair since it seemed ridiculous.

Flashback time: Long before this adventure, I had a group of friends who were discussing their campaign in D&D and told me that just about anything was possible. It sounded awesome and I asked if I could join them. They were cool with it, but I mentioned I wanted to play as a character in a wheelchair. Then they weren't cool with the idea.

Unfortunately, my wheelchair adventurer didn't work out like I wanted to since the inability to walk didn't really hinder on my experience. It was mostly just "there" as fluff, but I could still move and do other stuff without penalty. In fact, having the wheelchair seemed like a bonus since the DM shoehorned a parachute and flotation devices to prevent me from falling to death and from drowning.

Come the next campaign, I want to bring the concept back but this time I want to make him an immobile healer, so the rest of the party is compelled to keep my crippled-ass around so I can provide heals.

>>24412503
Is there some kind of deep-seated wheelchair fetish going on here in your subconscious?

Because your last paragraph sounds like that'd be no fun for everyone else having to drag your goddamn ass around. That sounds like too much of a burden when they could hire a healer who could protect themselves or better yet buy some potions.

Its kind of interesting, which is why your second session DM allowed you to run with it, but relegated it to fluff, meanwhile the kind of experience you want as described by the last paragraph makes me side with that first group in your flashback.

>>24412902
Haha, there isn't really fetish. I toyed around with the idea with the new group and they were very much against the wheelchair-healer concept. But the wheelchair idea stems from early 90's "diversity" concepts. Basically, every group had to show how diverse there was by having characters of different races and having at least one person in a wheelchair. Examples that come to mind: X-Men (not strictly 90s here), Ghostbusters Xtreme (unsure about the title), The BK Club...the idea is to try including this silly showing of diversity in a fantasy group, illustrating that anyone is capable of anything. Of course, when it comes down to meta-gaming, the lack of legs will become a hindrance on the character.

Now, if this becomes a problem for other characters in the group, I can see it being kind of interesting. Perhaps they're tired of trying to help me up stairs and secretly plot to kill me off. Or, perhaps they belittle me in public and some townsfolk belittle the party for treating a cripple like that. Who knows? I just see their being some interesting scenarios for a wheelchair hero.

>>24413017
It's interesting, but it's a choice that's limiting for the DM. Almost every situation comes down to "shit, what are we going to do with the wheelchair guy" and the party dies while trying to figure out a solution. Your choice of character pretty much forces every other character and situation to revolve around you.

There's a reason Professor X doesn't go out on dangerous missions with the X-men, (and why he has non-physical powers) because he'd be a liability. I'm not familiar with those other shows but I'm guessing they took place in the modern world. Your typical D&D setting doesn't have a lot of handi-accessible environments for adventures.

bump for interest! more stories guys! more!

Created a Deva Monk/Sorcerer named Lihi.

Her backstory was that she grew tired of serving the gods in the astral sea and bound herself to mortal flesh to advance herself in the mortal realm.

She's Good, but has stopped actively worshiping gods and in her last few incarnations, and has become and more willing to do whatever it takes to gain more power.

During her last incarnation, she has few clear memories of her actions, but has a feeling she did some terrible things and is desperate to find out what she had done.

So because we weren't too bright, we started at level one and I had it that Lihi had just been reborn on a rocky spot overlooking a riverbed in a standard foresty area.

> Walked along the river for a few hours, eventually come to a lake.
> notice a few strange holes in the ground, actually rather large, surrounded by strange markings, like someone stabbed a bunch of sticks into the dirt, but don't see any creatures around.
> continue on more carefully, eventually come to a small village on the other side of the lake.
> go to inn, inkeeper doesn't seem bothered by the 6'3, chalk white, blue-haired, rather lanky Deva, tells her that a lot of things have gone missing in the village lately, and they're trying to figure out whats the cause of it.
> Apparently, most anything that is left outside, food/supplies, tools, everything is going missing.
> I tell the man I would look into it, not just because the people are in need but because she could use it as a, I-just-got-reborn-let-me-get-used-to being-alive again exercise.
> inkeeper is grateful and lets me have a room facing facing the lake for free.

I have one; an actual, proper session and not a faux-session like my last post.

So after my players surprised me by not terminating a robobrain in my Fallout PnP; thus causing me to spend fifteen minutes going "oh fuck I can't even freeform this!" I suggest some DnD - but announce I want to be a player. The grognad of the group grudgingly says he'll DM. We've decided on 3.5 DnD.

So it comes to the next session and we sit down to play. His partner is tagging along because - I found this out when we sat down - we needed a Cleric. Anyway, the party is composed of two Dwarven Fighters, a Half-Wood Elven Ranger, a Human Cleric, and a Human Rogue. I'm the Rogue.

We leave the main city - meeting the cleric as we leave - and approach a village. Apparently bandits have been plaguing the village lately.
Eventually we come across an old house in the woods, to which we decide to investigate. We now hit green text and rounds now.

>Party approaches old house; nothing bad seems apparent.
>Second Dwarven Fighter opens the door. There is a treasure chest sitting in the middle; a yellow moss-like substance covering the inside of the cabin.
>OOC - I know what that is. I'm sitting there and am about to say 'Ok guys - let's think about this."
>Second Dwarven Fighters player yells "I STRIKE THE CHEST WITH CATHARINE!". Catharine is his warhammer. Me and the Cleric - also an old rpg-gamer - yell at him. The player said this in-character.
>The DM describes as my character reaches for the Dwarven Fighter's shoulder to stop him, but he still manages to smash the chest. He also disturbs the mould.
>Module-specific Yellow Mould releases a cloud of spores. Whole party takes Fortitude Saves. Hardy Dwarves resist; Ranger and Cleric resist; the Rogue does not.
>A poor roll nets me a small amount of temp Con damage.
>The other Dwarf - who has a Redbeard so we call him Redbeard (funnily enough his last name is Redmane) runs into the cabin and grabs the loot. Makes his Fort saves.

Cont.

>>24416696

>Loot = a sack full of coins and a few potions that were loose from the sack. They managed to survive the warhammer strike.
>I take the obvious potion of healing (apparently the GM said we needn't identify those) and we split the money.
>I turn to the second Dwarven Player, call him a bastard and tell him to THINK before he acts.

Later on we're in the bandit hideout; which happens to be a ruined temple.

>Party enters a small crypt - one room, several sarcophagi and a low-level undead creature.
>When we entered the doors slammed shut. I pull out my thieves tools and have a look at the door. Try to pick the lock; nope.
>Redbeard - his eyes filled with gold - tries each sarcophagi. He finds nothing in most of them.
>Redbeard opens the middle sarcophagus and finds an engraving written in Common. Its a pretty lame piece of poetry.
>Party explores the rest of the room as I finish determining that that doors can't be picked open. Three doors leading out are closed and won't budge.
>DM relates the piece of poetry to me again - since I can now read it. I look at him. Wait for fifteen minutes as we have a break/the others talk about breaking open doors, etc.
>I facepalm, walk up to a door and recite the lame poetry. Door opens.

>>24410774
Alright, I cannot even remember why my first game was. So I shall instead regale a demo-reel of the first campaign I was in (read: longer than 4 sessions). It lasted a year and a half of regular weekly gaming, so on the off chance anyone who participated in it is reading this thread: I don't recall every little detail, so here goes:
>Roll up a human bard, be all like 'buckle some swash an' shit.
>Join up with Cleric (who crossed in to paladin), Paladin (who crossed in to cleric) and an elf wizard. Other characters came and went, those were the core cast.
>Find out there's a house full of undead, so we go to the local lord's house to find out what we can of this shit. He's hosting some sort of ball, and we manage to get our selves invited.
>All hell breaks loose as the undead'o'mancer crashes the party with skelewags and some really creative undead. Takes like most of the people there, so being responsible adventurers we slept the night in an inn and prepared our selves to go rescue everyone.
>Get to creepy old manor in the middle of nowhere, delapedated, patrolled by undead minions of all kinds. The (not) BBEG had been very, very creative with his undeads, crafting all sorts of contraptions.
>As we get closer, realise manor is actually church.
>Team Paladic/Cleradin go mad, storm the front. Bard and Wizard try to keep up, being 1st level a wizard being less than effective when left with a buckle-some-swash character surrounded by skelewags. We just about keep up when we reach the inside of the descrated church.
>A huge thrones made of bones has a vampire sat on it. Going on about curing the condition of form or some shit (I don't recall). I go for a back stab, so glug a hide from undead potion.
>The cleradin charges, paladic ready to help.

>The fucking throne unfolds in to a huge scorpion-like thing that starts throwing the party around.
>Few turns later Cleric uses Turn on a prayer, rolls nat 20. The skelewag-throne-skorpion thing goes to leave.

>>24417348
Continued.
>Cleric then leaps on the underside, as the throne thing starts climbing walls, he hangs on for dear life as it ejects itself through the largest window. He gets thrown to the floor as it lands and it flees faster than the party can chase.
>Threat in the region over.
>Recover people, get sent on grand quest. A few sessions I either missed or ungratiously forget. In all likelihood either character building, or just shenanigans.
> Another session begins, like the 4th or 5th, we get ambused by undead. Fuck it, another hide from undead. Fuck it up royally, drink healing potion.
>Decided a couple of sessions earlier that mixing potions can result in hilarous effects based on what they were. Two healing potions could provide a permanent bonus, or build a resisitance, and all in between.
> Roll badly, turns out the reactions cause me to have a good aura to match and exceed that of the paladic.
>Reach town we're headed to.
>Sent on grand adventure by nobility who'd rather drink and fuck.
>Teleported across the word, to anther major city. Walk around for a bit until we discover that the BBEG was looking for magical items of creation. Three scarab necklaces which when combined had some ultimate power or something, but individually were merely potent magical items.
>The one in this city in hands of country famous gladiator.
>We go to his house. The skeleton scorpion throne fucking bursts out of a sewer (demolishing the street) and starts breaking down his house.
>Party turn up and start wrecking his shit.
>Skeleton chair has new additions, in the name of a balista loaded with good seeking bolts.
>DM nat 20's.
>And that was the first time I died.

And that was about session 5 of something close to 70odd.
I'm incredibly fuzzy on details as this started well over ten years ago (and a-forementioned 2.2kg of characters since).

>>24417462

The Paladin must have been glad you scoffed down those healing potions earlier.
I hate it when you forget those sessions that had the most funniest/excellent moments but remember the mundane ones.

>>24417676
Yeah he was very glad.
I wasn't butthurt, 'cause 1) it fit the feel, 2) I was young and disheartened by teh bard's combat prowess (or lack there of. I don't think Complete Warrior was even out then).
So I ended up taking over the gladiator. There were loads of really cool stuff that happened. Including a cell that the Cleric's player designed.
To say it kicked our arses is to say that Tomb of Horrors is a little bit difficult.

File: 1366740206737.jpg-(160 KB, 641x900, cleric_comm_by_yamao-d5ooj81.jpg)

160 KB JPG

3 or 3.5... I don't know really, was back in 2005 I think.
>It didn't go to far though, we stumbled around the a city, me being a cleric.
>After a merry round of get to know each other, we build up a pretty good feeling to the group.
>Then we got arrested for some murder, then we got thrown in jail
>I don't really remember how we got out of the jail
>We blast our way through the city, barely surviving onto a ship which we threw our girl character at the Captain, offering him a night
>Girl are an assassin, kills him, takes over the crew with charisma, she actually did an awesome speech!

Then we took a break for some odd reason... I sometimes wonder what kind adventures of piracy we could had accomplished...

In my first DnD game (3.5) i played a Chaot Favored Soul that got resurrected into a Smoke Genasi.

My character the most opted of them all[]/spoiler

I've never played, only DM'd.
Been DMing for 6 years.

>>24416572

Next morning, go downstairs and hear the inkeeper arguing with someone. I stand just out of view in the hallway and listen in.

> the innkeeper is saying that a strange traveler has arrived and will look into the strange string of thefts that's been happening over the last few months, but the younger man he's talking to sounds aggravated at the prospect of outside help and storms off in a huff.
> when I make my presence known, the inkeeper explains that he was talking to his son, and that he's "at that age" when he wants to prove himself a man and make his own rash decisions and has taken up a sword.
> not having ever been "at that age", since Devas are never children and are always reborn as an adult, I express no interest in the child/parent relationship dysfunction and ask if he could point me in the direction of some people who have had their belongings stolen.

I told this one a few times over the years but,

>Was trying to figure out the mystery of D&D after learning about it online
>Was into freeform RPing but I knew in my heart it was not enough
>Made up my own game in 8th grade that lacked dice, ran a space survival horror RPG
>Find out one of my computer science classmates has precious dice he was loath to leave behind during a fire drill
>Soon, rolling up my first character, elven rogue in 3.5
>Campaign starts! We're playing through MSN
>GM has his own character, a warlock, played as a PC
>GM's PC directing the adventure to get ioun stones for himself
>Kill a bunch of goblins attempt to loot their armor and weapons, suddenly turn to rust
>Loot chest with thiefy lockpicking skills, it's a weird gem! Totally intend to keep it
>GMPC yoinks it away from me
>Fight him, lose barely
>Next session GM introduces a cleric who swears loyalty to his warlock
>Game proceeds to turn into fucked up chucklefucksplosion after we leave initial dungeon, hindsight shows me that the DM only really wanted to fuck with us and ran a game as a means to facilitate his own powergaming fantasies.
>Everyone slowly backs away from his game, he's not happy.

Bump!

Started as a cleric, took forever to make because I was new.

Then when we got the game started we immediately start off by fighting a BBEG

Everyone was dying and it was up to me to make the game saving move...and I said
"I CAST LIGHT!
...on the Orb of Darkness"

A yin yang thing happened and created a magical equivalent of an hydrogen bomb... and sent us straight to hell...

When we made new characters turns out that I created an Ice age because I blocked out the sun with all the dust that I sent into the air.... ah good times

>High School
>some buddies invite to play D&D with them
>spend the first 2 hours or so making a Gnome Druid with a riding dog with the help of the DM
>campaign starts
>pretty fun so far
>we come across a strange looking door
>we start towards the door cautioslly
>DM says my dog sniffs the air and runs towards the door
>my character tells hid dog to stop and come back
>DM says my dog doesn't listen to me
>the dog comes up to the door and triggers a trap
>spikes impails him and he dies instantly
>DM says he doesn't like animal familiars or companions

I didn't play D&D for a while after that.

>>24419159

> find one of the holes I saw across the lake near the apothecary's house, go down into it and find a bunch of tunnels.
> run into the inkeeper's son, who threatens me with a sword. He want to play hero and "save" the village and doesn't want me stealing his glory.
> I convince him that I want to see the end of this situation and have no interest in glory and advice him that the apothecary knows to sound the alarm if I do not return within the hour.
> he eventually relents and explains that he's been traveling through these tunnels for weeks now following the creatures and that he has a plan for eradicating them.
> I have an idea about the creatures in these tunnels and decide that allowing the inkeeper's son to come to harm would be a poor repayment for the room I was given the previous night.
> So I punch the young man unconscious and deposit him on the floor in front of his father's bar and return to the caves to do the work myself.

>>24424411
Wow, your DM sounded like a real dick. Do you remember what your next few games were like?

>>24424552
Storytime? Storytime.

bump before bed. want more storytimes!

Bumping for interest. Also could somebody please be so nice and screencap the stories? Im on my mobile and some posts dont show up for chanelite.

>my first ever D&D experience
>local youth activity center
>neckbeard GM
>we were barely even allowed to roll up characters
>no feats, no real skills, we're all village dumbfucks
>in retrospect we weren't just railroaded - we were drugged, blackbagged and locked in a trunk and put on a freight-train
>one of the two female players had rolled quite poorly for Cha (Cha 6 for her female character...)
>GM's quickfix: "One night yall are at the tavern drinking - through the haze of booze [girl character] looks a lot better. Cha is now 10"
>Somehow that effect persists long after the booze wore off
>multiple counts of the GM going "No you can't do that, your character [X] instead - now roll for it"
>GM gets visibly upset/insulted when we actually pass our checks to avoid crying when our characters are getting whipped for bullshitry
>game fell apart after second session when the GM simply didn't want to play anymore

...and for some reason I don't like playing D&D these days

I don't really remember much about my first D&D game. I do remember it was only 3 of us. I played a Druid and thought Grease was hilarious. The other two didn't.

I guess I was That Guy.

My first experience with 4e was a bit of a shocker. I'd heard from people that it was pretty easy compared to 3e (my only experience with 2e was those old vidya games). The DM also knew I had some experience with 3rd and asked me to make sure I didn't make something off the chain because of the 4 players I was the only one with D&D experience. I ended up going with a really watered down Fighter. Like really watered down. Leather Armour, Spear and Shield. A very bog standard footslogger.

After nearly dying to our first encounter we ended up facing a goddamn dragon. It didn't attack though and we were obviously supposed to either run or talk. I was very much deadset on the former. The others were all deadset on the latter. So they fuck it up, it starts breathing ice everywhere and I buy them some time to cut and run. As I run out, one retard gets all heroic and runs back in. So the cleric runs back in to save her and the wizard runs in to help. One is dead by the time my turn comes around and the other two are unconscious. I actually flipped a coin because I wasn't sure if I should risk the rescue or fuck'em and bolt. At the very least I wanted to save our bro as cleric.

So I run back in there, I sling the cleric over my shoulder, but the dragon blocks my way back out. I noticed some doors on the other wall before so I tell the DM that I spin around and kick them open.
>"As you spin you notice they are made of bronze"
Well shit. But I rolled high and have reasonable strength. So I kicked down those bronze doors and booked it out.

Then immediately fell down a pit trap and was killed by a Dire Rat.

File: 1366799160554.jpg-(325 KB, 540x515, 1364014614390.jpg)

325 KB JPG

>DM makes DnD 3.5 campaign based off Dragon Quest
>Level 3, 200 gold
>Tried to roll for a Human Scout, ended u rolling a Lumberjack Commando named Hannigan Blackheart
>Think Tanith Ghosts + Paul Bunyan
>Dual-wields hand axes and skirmishes around battlefield
>Raised by Dwarven lumberjacks and is on a quest to find the man who slew his clan using a weapon known as "The Herring"
>Somehow get caught up investigating a castle that was besieged by Orcs/Goblins/Ogres together with a Human Duskblade, a Half-Giant Soulknife, a Halfling Beguiler, and a Human... bard (I think).

I can't really remember how the sequence went but here are some things that happened during that campaign:
>Rolled 3 or 4 20's with Use Rope just so I could make a simple knot up and down a tall temple
>Find a wooden duck carving that allows me to talk to ducks
>Convince a duck to sneak into Orge Warchief's room
>Duck and I end up in an argument and I end up murdering the duck (for dinner)
>Party and I push the Warchief off the higher floor of the castle and into the rubble below (killing him)
>Find out that "The Herring" is used to unlock the Book of Dreams when it has slain enough people (thereby turning it into the Red Herring)
>Tried to make a wooden carving of a Basilisk to see if I could talk to Basilisk. Didn't work.
>Acquire Brachiation feat, use it to gleefully skip through a forest
>Find a treasure chest that will only allow Good aligned beings to open it
>End up in a "what's the worst thing you've done?" discussion with other party members until we find out that only the Beguiler is good-aligned among us
>Force Beguiler to open chest and throw out treasure for us
>Learned the ritual: "Ceremonial-Cutting-Down-of-Trees"

>>24434032

It only lasted about 5 or 6 sessions (DM got busy with school) but it was a lot of fun. I even gave him a theme song based on the Thundercats theme song:

>Lumber, Lumber, Lumberjacks, Ho!

>Lumberjacks are on the move,
>Lumberjacks are loose!
>Feel the woodchips; hear the “Ho!”
>Lumberjacks are loose!

>Lumber, Lumber, Lumber, Lumberjacks!
>Lumber, Lumber, Lumber, Lumberjacks!
>Lumber, Lumber, Lumber, Lumberjacks!
>Lumber, Lumber, Lumber, Lumberjacks! Lumberjacks!

File: 1366799439859.jpg-(105 KB, 740x758, 1364073161033.jpg)

105 KB JPG

>>24434041

I later "resurrected" him in another campaign that started out as Indiana Jones an the Temple of Doom and ended up as 20,000 Leagues: Little Mermaid.

Ah, good times.

File: 1366799600565.jpg-(85 KB, 350x455, module O2 - Blade of Vengeance.jpg)

85 KB JPG

One on one
>Pic
Multiple people
Module C4 (To Find a King)

File: 1366799740864.jpg-(34 KB, 273x356, TSR11327.jpg)

34 KB JPG

First one, only one, had fun then moved on with my life

>>24434080
You're not one of us, you're not one of us at all.

I'm not sure if it's because you had fun, or because you moved on with your life.

I don't remember any campaign details, but I do remember having re-read Elfquest.
So, naturally, I thought elves were the shit and tried to give my PC a funny name.
I was probably nine years old at the time.

I was 13 or so and the youngest person in the group by about a decade. I shared my character with dad. 5th level wizard. Because the DM hadn't played in ages and no one way paying much attention, we all figured that 5th level wizards had 5th level spells. Right? Right. Additionally, the DM extended the offer to make custom magic items for everybody. Nobody but my dad and I really took him up on it much. We spent a solid half hour making cool, ridiculous items. Most importantly was a coin that could contain any fire with 60 feet, then release it at a time of the users choosing.

Being new wizard players, we filled a lot of spell slots with fireball.

Met the group in a bar. Then demons teleported in for some reason(some bullshit about gnomes being the guardians of the interdimensional clock that makes time or some shit like that).

Naturally, my first action was to fireball the demons and the NPCs they were eating. I was careful not to get any players in the blast radius, but because of some crap about 'good' alignments, they ran into the now-on-fire part of the bar to rescue the NPCs anyway. For some reason, all the NPCs survived, though unconscious(I guess the DM didn't want the blood of 3 innocents on my hands). Anyway, The fireball killed 2/4 demons instantly, and badly wounded the 3rd, while the other 3 strangers in the bar flailed around ineffectually.

Then the boss demon teleports in after the others are mopped up. I threw down the fire absorption coin so that I could have my little fireball hand grenade(I got a loooooooot of mileage outta that). For some reason I decided that NOW I cared about NPCs, so I teleported upstairs(there were stairs and it would have been as fast to walk, but 5th level wizard with 5th level spells trololololol). The DM didn't want me up there, so I fell through the ceiling(something about the fire I started 2 rounds back weakening the supports) back into the fight. Then, I pulled out another custom magic item: the Teddy bear golem.

>>24434154
The teddy bear golem was a teddy bear until you threw it, at which point it became a grizzly for two rounds. So we roll to throw the bear.

Natural 1.

DM looks straight at me and I can still remember the exact words and bemused tone: "You are now riding the bear."

Being that it was a 14 foot tall kodiak, frail little wizard me is immediately smashed into the ceiling while the bear starts whaling on the boss demon. Meanwhile, I'm taking damage every round for having roof splinters ground a foot up my asshole.

2 rounds later, the demon dies and burst into a portal, though not before the bear unbears into Teddy form and I fall to the bar floor, again. At this point I've taken more damage than the rest of the group combined.

So we get sucked into the other dimension and the DM talks to himself for a while about the 'plot'. I think a snake lady talking about destiny or something. I don't remember. So we all wandered off to go make more explosions and stop the universe from ending or standing still or something.

So ended session one.

>>24434154
>>24434205
Shit you played your first session with your dad? Your dad sounds like a total bro.

bump