>>37087254
>Rhodes, beleaguered General of the Maverick Hunters.

Time to drink all the eggnog on base while trying to make this year-long headache go away.

>Rhodes, beleaguered General of the Maverick Hunters.

Perhaps we could get a larger dildo for Command to shove up their collective asses.

>>37087254
>Susan, luckless Steel Beret.
I just want to see how many times in one day he has to explain that, no, it has nothing to do with the song.

>>37087254
>Dodo

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>>37087254
>Dash Dodo, fast attack/desk attack specialist.
Needs more birds.

>Susan
Poor bastard.

And happy New year, all!

>>37087254
>Aegis Garm, putting the SA in Santa

>>37087254
>>Rhodes, beleaguered General of the Maverick Hunters.

>Dash Dodo

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Gah, that Dodo vote came in just after I started writing for Rhodes. We'll probably be doing that one next, then.

Can we have another Q&A?

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>>37087287
>>37087303
>>37087622
You are General Rhodes, G-rank, leader of the maverick hunters, and you hate Christmas.

Not that it's really a breach in character for you. You hate everything. Christmas, though, is the worst. Mostly because of what it does to your personnel, or rather, what they do to themselves.

Specifically, alcohol, and through what they do to themselves with alcohol, what they do to you.

And all the worse, you're expected to use a light touch with the disciplinary measures because of nonsense like "it's the holidays," and "no one really got hurt," and on, and on, and on.

When you took this job, X told you to be sparing with the punishments. Before him, Zero was too busy afield for this sort of management in his short-lived career. Between your most recent predecessors, you have to admit you agree most strongly with the precedent set by Sigma--though for obvious reasons, that's not the sort of thing you go around saying. Still, he was firm and he was effective, and he managed to instill some backbone in the organization long before he ripped it in two.

You have a pile of incident reports to sift through. And, sure enough, somehow, every single unit under your command has made the naughty list, even Unit Zero. Heaving yet another sigh to the uncaring heavens, you start examining the reports, beginning with...
>select unit

>>37087254
Can't decide between:
>Susan, luckless Steel Beret.
>Rhodes, beleaguered General of the Maverick Hunters.

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>>37087839
Absolutely!

>>37087844
>4th

>>37087844
>artillery

>>37087844
>1st

>>37087844
I'm curious about the 1st.

>>37087844
>1st

Might as well go in order.

>implying 0 comes before 1

NOT IN MEGAMAN MOTHERFUCKERS

>>37087844
0th. Seem likely to have caused the most damage, need to get a headstart on their shenanigans.

>>37087844
Start from the bottom and work our way up.

>1st

>>37087844
First. We'll save the Zero Shinobi for last.

You HAD to run during a workday. Still love you, but man.

>>37087844
May as well do them in order.

1st.

>>37087844
What did the ride armor guys do? Aren't there like three of them left, tops?

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>>37087923
>>37087960
>>37087962
>>37088010
You heave a sigh, and start from the top of the list. Let the sad, sad show commence.

The First Advance report is written by Striker Cobra personally, with no small note of remorse in his missive. It seems one of his officers, Spike Centaurius, is being written up for conduct unbecoming and disorderly conduct. Striker takes some personal responsibility for the breach, and it becomes clear why--one of Cobra's many eccentricities is responsible. Specifically, his annual competition with some of those ancient games he makes a habit of collecting.

This one was apparently "Mario Kart" and "Smash Brothers." You don't pretend to understand this or his obsession with the things, but apparently some result or other in the contest resulted in an argument that escalated drastically. You pinch the bridge of your nose, skimming the report's unimportant details--someone beat Centaurius at the end of a race, taunted him, and, enraged, he hauled off and tackled his unitmate. Before breaking up the fight, witnesses were only able to make out shouts of "it was blue," whatever the blazes that means.

Physically attacking a fellow officer is a fairly steep offense as far as things that cross your desk go, but with Cobra's personal account (not to mention "in his place, I'd do the same,") you sigh and consign Spike Centaurius to the bare minimum punishment--written warning, a month of remedial duties.

And the replacement of the destroyed game console, as Striker requested. If he weren't so old and useful...

At least he keeps in-house matters relatively tame. That one wasn't so bad, but you have another seventeen to go.
>

>>37088258
Good thing it wasn't Mario Party, or shit would have burned.
And since we started going in order...
>2nd

>>37088258
>Any unit that has Lifesavers chopping off Hunters' limbs
But seriously
>2nd

>>37088258
Well, it's a good thing it wasn't Mario Party. There would have been fatalities.

ROLL OUT DUMBASS UNIT #2.

>>37088258
>2
On with this shit show.

>>37088258
>2nd
Work through them in order
Striker seems a real bro, have Anode met him yet?

>>37088417
Not until we fuck with Blitz.

>>37088449
That's the guy fucking our sister, yeah? We have an obligation to do something to him that makes what we did to Seven pale in comparison.

>>37088504
Think Cobra would let us into Blitz's quarters...?

>>37088504
He's not just going out with Cathode. He's going out with Cathode WHILE BEING A BAT.

If they don't lock us up for days after we're done with him, we didn't go far enough.

>>37088548
Misread as 'would let us into Blitz's pants' at first.

>>37088548
We just got to ask nicely, maybe see if we can get him something nice and old-school (after finding out in-character about his vidya interests)

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>>37088295
>>37088310
>>37088329
>>37088340
The Second has been a busy place lately. Scope Mouse, ironically, left some big shoes to fill, and in some ways his loss--years ago, now--is still keenly felt. Not only does the Second suffer grievous casualties doing what might be the most dangerous part of a maverick hunt, the recon, but their low combat ratings make them easy to insult in the typical inter-unit rivalry chest-thumping. Commander Longshot Koala isn't bothered by it--you've never seen him bothered by anything, aside from nursing a fatalist streak almost on par with your own. Unfortunately, the same can't be said for a great many of his officer corps, who have something of a chip on their collective shoulder. Ray Marmosentry was apparently challenged by a member of Command (whose name they have redacted from their own report filing, you find to your annoyance) to test the new counterintrusion defenses they've been arranging after the disaster with the Eight Armored. The challenge time came and went quietly enough, but apparently, tonight, the Command agent sent a smug call to Ray. "I suppose the new security is good enough, then," he said.

That was when the explosive charges in his office minifridge, ceiling lamp, desk lamp, and chair went off.

The detonation didn't even set off the fire alarms, but it did get someone with more stripes than sense hopping mad, and now he's attempting to

Sorry, whoever you are, you very literally asked for it. A token fine for use of hunter explosions, and a request for a copy of the security gap reports you're quite sure Marmosentry has banged out in detail. And maybe a promotion in a few months, heh. You probably shouldn't approve as much as you do.

>Next?

>>37088559
>WHILE BEING A BAT
I'd forgotten that part, my sides went into orbit

>>37088618
I love 2nd.
>3rd

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>>37088623
>>37088584
>>37088571
>>37088559
>>37088548
>>37088504
>>37088449

>>37088618
>3rd
Though I can hardly wait for 4th

>>37088559
>Ok, Bravely Broken. Our team exercise is to totally humiliate a certain 1st unit member, who may or may not be a bat.
>... Did he agree to this?
>Shut up, Susan.

>>37088618
I think I like 2nd. Anyway, on we go
>3rd

>>37088723
>We will attack the Bat from three fronts: Physical, Emotional and Psychological. Through this multi-sensory assault we aim to wear him down worse than any battlefield ever could.

>>37088618
Lets see what the 3rd group of very nearly literal children under our command has done to piss Santa off tonight.

>>37088723
I bet we could get hold of deactivated baaaaaats, string them on a wire and wear them as a necklace when we meet him. Maybe bite the head off one, just to get the point across.

This is really nice as a refresher course, because I've mostly forgotten which units are which.

>>37088838
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/17791182/
Halfway down, Em lists them.

>>37088869
Ahhhh, thank you. I didn't know which one had that.

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>>37088637
>>37088682
>>37088743
>>37088785
Third Deploy, as you had grimly predicted, is the first incident involving misuse of mechaniloids. And, if the last few years have been any indication, they won't be the last. It seems like you can't swing a dead bat without hitting another breach of policy involving dumb, programmable robots. If there's a kind and loving God, He does not grace the halls of Maverick Hunter headquarters at Christmastime.

Deploy organized a holiday parade, repurposing some of their unused superheavy vehicles into the bodies of parade floats. Some of these were formerly guided and controlled by simple mechaniloid intelligences, if you want to call them that. Apparently, someone--investigation ongoing, but if you were a betting man, it would be Chain Lynx, who at the best of times has barely plausible denials--re-engaged some of the protocols on a formerly decommissioned mechaniloid truck.

Specifically, its hunter/killer protocols as an antitank weapon. It proceeded to fix target lock on the parade float ahead of it in line and began to pursue it doggedly through the streets of Geneva, bombarding it with tinsel cannons as the driver helplessly tried to guide a truck that handles like a pregnant cow through crowded alleyways.

Double-edged sword, this one--the parents were horrified, the children were delighted. And of course, so were the media. That seems to be the trend with mechaniloid incidents. Well, when Lynx--the culprit (and you make a point of writing her name and "correcting" yourself) is caught, they can enjoy a month of community service to the city of Geneva. You'll have to see if you can convince the mayor to find her a spot on the Municipal Service garbage trucks.

>4th?

>>37088956
>Skip to 5th for REASONS.

>>37088956
>4th?
Hell yeah!

>>37088989
Can't be too predictable, can we?

>>37088956
You bet your ass.
>4th

And someone make a note to have Anode met his new best friend Lynx at some point.

>>37088956
4th.

>>37089025
Would India love or hate Lynx?

>>37089021
That's how the Mavs get you.

>>37088956
>4th?

No. First scotch. Then 4th.

>>37089048
I ship i- ohgodcainlabspleasenottheface

>>37089061
To be honest, I half expect Anode to go Mav at some point. Or at least have to go rogue to prove his innocence after being properly accused of Maverickery.

>>37089048
...It'd be a love-hate relationship. It's great, yeah, but... those poor machines.

>>37089085
Too be honest, I indulge people who talk about shipping more because it anoys Cain than anything else.

>>37089109
Is it wrong that I really want to play Anode as a Maverick?

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Oh dear lord, time to see what we're up to.

>>37089155
It could be cool to play as a Mav being hunted at some point in the future. Take out a Hunter Squad as the Mav before going after him as Anode.

>>37089129
What are you talking about? Shipping is crucial to the global economy and is a key reason I can get diverse supplies of off-season groceries and specialty goods from around the world down at my local stores.

>>37089327
I can hardly container my relief.

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>>37089002
>>37089025
>>37089029
If you were capable of trembling, your hand would shake as you turned the page to the Fourth Overland report. The last year has been a maelstrom of insanity from one of the most ... unusual units in the organization.

Frog has always run an informal ship, and at the end of the day, you can't quite hate him for it. He's a mirror of your own problem; while you want the job and lack the means to do it as you'd like, he hates his position but he's managed to keep the Fourth strong since he caved Pulse Potamus's chest in with that hammer of his. Pardoning him his laxity on discipline only seems fair, though you'll never fail to let him know how much you dislike it.

Before this year, it was usually one Captain Emerald who, despite never having even seen him in person, has nonetheless managed to conjure in your mind the image of a very drunk hurricane. Three years back, it was the cow and the beam saber wall defacement. After that, it was some sort of self-inflicted injury after he attempted to elbow drop his would-be mentor, the venerable Major Schwarzhund, from the roof of the main headquarters building. (Schwarzhund opted not to press assault charges, citing that "it would have worked if he had accounted for windspeed.") Last year, it was the Saberpult incident, which nearly drove you to the bottle yourself.

This year, however, he's found an accomplice who has managed to make your life a living hell, and his name is Lieutenant Anode.

Apparently this year's disaster began with the best of intentions--the two of them heard that a nativity scene on church property in the city had been defaced, and two of the figures stolen. Unable to track down the culprit before Christmas mass, the two hunters volunteered to take the place of the missing figures.

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>>37089410
Unfortunately, they were unable to stop being themselves during the service. You turn a tired eye to the transcript testimony overheard, quite clearly, from inside the church:

LT. ANODE
Hey Em, why are you one of the Wise Men?

CPT. EMERALD
Dunno, why aren't you the ass?

LT. ANODE
Shouldn't you be playing the Virgin Mary, instead?

CPT. EMERALD
Can't do that anymore. Neither can your sister.

LT. ANODE
You motherf--

What began as a well-meaning effort to reach out to the community went dearly awry. A passing Earth Commander patrol identified two Reploids in combat with hi-beam weapon signatures and the explosion of registered charitable property (one (1) Baby Jesus), alerted HQ of probably maverick activity, and given the season and locale, resulted in an emergency scramble of multiple hunter teams backed by heavy mechaniloid support.

Merry Christmas to the entire Catholic faith, courtesy of the Maverick Hunters.

You're... actually at a loss for how to punish them. The church has said that their misguided attempt to help should grant them leniency (how you hate that word), and Command won't authorize Final Weapon's use for another six months.
>Discipline the 4th officers?

>>37089410
Yesssssssss.

>>37089424
Community service working in the church as the choir

>>37089424
Hmm. Community service? Force them to repair all of the damage they did. If they didn't do that much damage, slap some NJP on top of that. Confinement to base, cleaning the base- if they have time to get in trouble they clearly aren't being worked hard enough, etc.

>>37089424
What kind of shit duty does no-one want?

>>37089424
Just reach for that old bottle of fine scotch you got when you were appointed to your station. You finally found a use for it.

>>37089477
Why do the poor churchgoers need to be punished?

>>37089424
Are e sure we can't put a rush on the Final Weapon? Maybe as a 'test firing'?

Fine... community service. All of the community service.

>>37089424
They will help repair that church. Then, they will do community service cleaning and polishing that church every week until you can look at that transcript without facepalming.

>>37089424
Let the rookie Lifesavers train on them.

>>37089424
>Command won't authorize Final Weapon's use for another six months.
I'm not sure what this is, but it sounds exciting.

>>37089527
And they have to replace Baby Jesus.

>>37089424
Two months of community service, separate

>>37089589
"Why is baby Jesus Asian now?"
"What are you, racist?"

>>37089477
>>37089478
>>37089527
Considering the damage was caused by the two of them doing community service together, they shouldn't be allowed to repeat that mistake

>>37089617
"I'm sorry Lieutenant Anode, but Baby Jesus was very explicitly not a metool."

>>37089655
"Show me where in the Bible it says that! Show me!"
"Not while - ack - you're hitting me with it-!"

>>37089424
Have them work in an orphanage/homeless shelter/soup kitchen for 1 year.

Repay any and all damages caused by their shenanigans.

>>37089644
Oh yeah, no, definitely whatever you do make sure it's separate.

>>37089731
We'd end up recruiting half the people as Hunters. Or there'd be Maverick attacks every week. Or both.

>>37089424
If we have them cleaning something, we can go old school and give them toothbrushes to do it with.

>>37089853
Even though I love this, it seems too creative for Rhodes

Hey, Cain Labs. Seeing as HC's going to be doing so much typing for Rhodes' trauma, anyone you'd like to have a Q&A for?

>>37090474
Aw, have fun. (We did Frog, though the others sound good.)

>>37089424
Community service to repair the church.
OOH GENIUS
Do it while they both carry around a heavily-reinforced metal cross for the both of them, densest material you've got.

>>37089424
think we're going to have to go cruel and unusual punishment here. Find the most boring public safety class you can find that you could bullshit into saying they need it, like a weapon safety class or something and have it be mandatory. Make sure they are in separate classes. If nothing else this will keep them busy for awhile so they can't do other stupid shit. Also throw in community serves in there as well to make it try and look official. If you can't throw the book at them might as well slap so many little things on them that you could hopefully get at least a month without there bullshit.

>>37089981
Man if it wasn't today I would definitely run a concurrent Q&A, but I have to head off for a New Year's Eve party soon. It comes a bit earlier for me than for much of the readerbase. If you want HC to run it... not Rhodes, since I'd have to be here for that, but he could definitely do X or Zero.

Yeah, we did Frog... I wanted to do something else with him, which is why I bring it up, but we have time for that in 2015. Who's fun... well, actually, there's a new character I'd REALLY like to see get the Q&A but he hasn't been introduced yet.

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>>37089424
You're about to sign the two imbeciles to community service oblivion again, but the fact that community service brought this report to your desk in the first place gives you pause. After a moment's consideration, you decide the best place to keep them is on-base, away from anything fragile or holy or collateral. Shame they're both high enough rank that they're worth keeping around. Then again, summary public executions are apparently frowned upon these days.

No, for these idiots, it's written apologies--by hand, no less--and then a steep deduction from their respective pay to make up for the damages. The church you'll have to offer repairs from personnel who aren't dervishes of mayhem (if you can find any), and the officers will be restricted to a month of whatever childproofed, running-with-safety-scissors punitive tasks Frog can find for them. They deserve worse, but no one deserves them.

Welcome to the Fourth, they call it. Sometimes you wonder if Frog's job is worse than yours. Only sometimes.

>Fifth?

>>37090538
May as well. Fourth has the record to beat with their not-quite-blasphemy.

>>37090538
>fifth

>>37090538
You bet your ass.

>>37090538
>5th
Let's keep the procession rolling.

>>37090538
>Fifth

>>37090596
Fifth deals information and communication, so they may pull ahead in the idiot Olympics.

>>37090538
>a month of whatever childproofed, running-with-safety-scissors punitive tasks Frog can find for them.
Batton maintenance!
...with their weapons systems unhooked and some armed guards.

>>37090538
Completely off-topic, but what's the pic source?

>>37089424
>Can't do that anymore. Neither can your sister.
Anode honestly can't be blamed for this incident

>>37090694
A short cartoon about an old Viking looking to die in battle. The gif is one of his would-be opponents.

>>37090705
tbh, anode needs a medal for this

>>37090743
Thanks, I'll have to look it up.

>>37090538
Don't feel too bad Rhodes. Remember that they pulled a bunch of hunters away from whatever mirthful distraction they'd found for themselves into what they thought was a holiday themed hostage situation. Consider what shining beacons of professionalism your subordinates have shown themselves to be and use your imagination.

>>37090705
I just imagine a black dude standing up in his pew and shouting "OHHH SHIT" at that burn.

>>37090761
It was probably more entertaining than a nativity, too. Maybe they'll be asked back next year?

>>37090847
I'll bet the kids loved it.

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>>37090596
>>37090597
>>37090598
>>37090599
>>37090613
Fifth Communications is almost refreshingly mundane stupid after the last one. Like NORAD, the Maverick Hunters do a Santa tracker every year. You've always vaguely waited for someone to ruin it for everyone by hacking the system and reporting Santa shot down over Norway, but thus far the fates have been (largely) cooperative.

On the other hand, this time someone hacked the thing and painted one of their associates in the unit, second-in-command Echo Loqutus. You've gathered, over your tenure here, that 5th's second-in-command is not a popular one. The Santa tracker did its job faithfully, as it cheerfully broadcast to the world how Echo skipped from party to party, seeking nothing other than to get liquored up and raid the next unit's shindig. Unfortunately, around the sixth or seventh party, someone had it up on the monitors. The last visit of the night was him storming home to the Fifth's offices in central HQ and physically assaulting the Santa team. Punishment for the instigator, punishment for the instigated, and a fracas the internet won't shut up about for the next four months. Just another day in Geneva.

>Sixth?

>>37091013
Watching the same show as every yearSUDDENLYBEAMWEAPONS
You just know they were backflipping everywhere and showing off, ending with an overdramatic death scene.

>Sixth?
You betcha.

>>37091042
Sixth.

>>37091099
There couldn't have been a death scene, Emerald is still alive to be punished.

>Sixth.

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>>37091042

Sixth please.

>>37091042
I love the hunters

>>37091042
Absolutely.

>>37091042
Hmm, we should have Wellington help us prank Echo.
>sixth maids a milking

>>37091121
Time to hit on Sapphire in front of him!

>>37091042
>Loqutus

Naming a dude after a Borg is just asking him to go Maverick.

Anyway, onto sixth. I'm betting Em's sister.

>>37091042
Please do.

>>37091042
>Sixth
We Norwegians love it when foreigners remember we exist

>>37091152
Prank exchange! He helps us with Blitz, we help him with Echo!

>>37091263
What is this 'Norwegian' of which you speak?

>>37091308
It's like a cleaner Glaswegian, just with a sillier accent and a job that pays well

>>37091299
Lt. Anode: Pranker for Hire. No chaos too big, no fuck-up too small.

>>37091263
Back into your hole

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>>37091042
The Sixth Marine is... well, this is almost impressive in its disastrousness.

For starters: One Lieutenant Sapphire (related, because of course she is, to the green jackass in the Fourth) co-opted some equipment from the North African 16th R&D coastal fortress for the express purpose of turning hydromer into ethanol. She and Needler Blowfish and Maelstrom Mako, both also 6th, took the cheap alcohol along with an entire shipment of domain projectors for an "underwater cyberspace party." This went well if stupidly, until someone--apparently an "avid gamer" after meeting one Lieutenant India (how you loathe that name, and of course she's Overland), got the idea to scare a fellow "avid gamer" with an army of cyberspace simulations. Namely, of some sort of hostile creature from some unimportant game or other called a Lobsterman.

The result, on this already-drunken companion, was disastrous. They opened fire, detonating the 100% ethanol container, and damaging or outright destroying the entire set of cyberspace projectors--which, by the way, are not rated for operation underwater.

A hydromer tank converted to cheap ethanol, theft and misuse of R&D property to do so, theft of 6th Marine hydromer supplies in the first place, yet MORE theft of the domain pylons, now a writeoff between water damage, RUI damage (Reploids Under the Influence), and Lobsterman firestorm damage. The global cyberspace domain project has now been set back even further than it already was, and, though less painful for publicity, this one is far and away the most damaging expense of the day.

So far.

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>>37091603
So, let the punishment(s) fit the crime(s). First, isotope separation duty for the theft--split out deuterium and tritium from the damaged water supply, atoms at a time. Have fun with that, Marine, because when they're done, you're assigning them to three months of shoreline cleanup, to cheerfully remind them that half of the North African zone has been comprised of stagnant oil and dead things for decades. And to make up for the loss of the cyberspace domain, they can do some stress-testing in the default (read: blank white space) environment as test dummies.

Well. That one is going to hurt the bottom line, but you sure feel better after meting out the punishment.
>Seventh?

>>37091603
Man, I can't believe she didn't invite us!

>>37091620
>htneves

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>>37091620
>Sheventh

Because I have to get back to my party: Happy New Years!

>>37091620
Beautiful. Come on Diamond, lets go for that Hat Trick!

>>37091700
Please let there be a fish-based 'loid named James Pond in 2nd. Please.

>>37091744
James Pond has to be in 6th, maybe 7th

>>37091728
Happy New year, filthy socialiser!

>>37091620
emerald and saphire, wonder what diamond will do

>>37091785
Ninth.

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>>37091620

7th Division, front and center!

Question: why does Anode have a giant damn spike on one shoulder? Which parent's drunken decision was that?

>>37091620
Six down, eleven (twelve?) left

>>37091915
It's probably on both shoulders, you just can't see it on the other side of the OP pic because the plating is rotated to allow for the salute.

>>37091935
It's on other pics, there's just one. Not really bothered by it, but it makes me curious why we've never tried to use it in a close-up fight.

>>37091975
You know, I never even noticed that shoulder spike until now. If I had, I would have suggested more shoulder checks.

I'm starting to get the feeling that reploids are ALL batshit insane to some degree.

>>37092056
Isn't that a given?

>>37092056
You guys haven't even met the leader of the madhouse yet.

>>37092056
Well most of them aren't very old.

>>37092070
Man, you're getting me excited now

>>37092056
My new aim is to get Anode famous... on YouTube. Maverick-hunting? Screw that!

>>37092070
Meeting him/her when?

>>37092096
Start making exaggerated montages showcasing MH training with the berrets accompanied by cheesy heavy metal music.

>>37092143
I'll never watch Rocky the same way again.

>>37092070
I have this odd feeling that the Good Doctor Cain is someone who enjoys his drink and wanted to share his joy to all his children.

This may or may not be how the Maverick problem actually started. Less virus, more Sigma getting helluva drunk and having to keep going.

>>37092091
>>37092119
I'm not ENTIRELY sure... but we're definitely closer than not.

>>37092262
I dread to think how many prankster reploids have been killed for supposedly going maverick, when they just thought it'd be funny to, say, steal the UN flags off the front of Hunter HQ.

>>37092357
When it comes to military grade killer robots I can understand a "Shoot first, ask questions later"-policy.

>>37092397
What if they're replacing the flag with someone's underwear?

>>37092431
You never know with mav's, man... They're an unpredictable bunch, aside from attack patterns.

>this thread

I've known people in the military who have gotten demoted/booted out for less than what these hunters are doing. How the hell aren't they decommissioned yet?

>>37092443
And sometimes those attack patterns involve leopard-print panties.

>>37092488
They cost a fortune to build.

>>37092488
Personnel shortages. Also, individuals hunters seem to be much more expensive than individual infantrymen would be, so there's a higher sunk cost.

>>37092500
Or attacking x-amount of times before revealing your weak spot

>>37092488
People in the military haven't been custom-designed to fill critical roles that nobody else can reasonably occupy. Check with the enlisted ranks, see if they pull any of this shit. They will look at you with GREAT alarm.

>>37092526
Or just running into walls.
A lot.

>>37092519
Yeah, individual hunters cost a shitload.

>>37092488
I imagine there's a whole slew of ethical issues to go along with that.

Not to mention that it's a toss up between letting them have their fun, or potentially introducing unrest into the ranks with severe punishments.

When you spend a fortune to build a living weapon who fights to defend humans against it's own kind, you're kind of obliged to let them have their wind-ups and wind-downs every now and again.

>>37092535
Those poor guys. I hope we get Susan's POV tonight.

>>37092618
That's the PoV I'm most excited for

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>>37091620
Miraculously, the Seventh incident has a lack of any gemstone-related culprits. It's still pretty damned stupid, though.

The Air Cavalry maintains a diverse stable of operatives and aircraft, including heli, VTOL, and conventional runway-takeoff vehicles. To facilitate their use in the winter, someone devised what basically amounts to a jet turbine on wheels, using the massive compressor system to blast the runway clear of snow in minutes instead of hours.

The alcohol, of course, came into play once again, as a drunken soldier opened a hangar door from the Christmas party going on within, took a step outside, and promptly got blown 40 yards back by the exhaust of the snowblower fan, crashlanding in a snowbank. He was fine, no one was hurt, and it could have--it should have--ended there. But, of course, why should it?

Instead, under the influence, the intrepid Seventh officers decided to play a game of "Will It Launch," using increasingly heavy/improbable items airblasted across creation. The festivities came to a halt, however, when they tried--and succeeded--to launch an active mechaniloid. Dropped directly into the fan's path from above, it rocketed clear of the seventh airstrips, over their hangars, and managed to be embedded, face-first, into the concrete of the oldest memorial on the hunter grounds, kicking its sad little legs out the side uselessly.

You should probably be more upset about this, but the fact is you absolutely hated that statue. Good riddance. Concrete is so last century.

A slap on the wrist, considering people could have gotten killed--abuse of hunter equipment, misuse of mechaniloids, risk of endangerment, defacement of public property. A month of doldrums, whitewashing fences for the city of Geneva, and non-combat grounding for everyone in that hangar.

And a quiet petition to remove that stupid statue.

>Ninth?

>>37092836
>Ninth?
Eight was wiped out, so I guess ninth would be the next in line

>>37092836
>Ninth?
you know it

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>>37092836

Keep the gravy-train going and check in on the 9th, I guess...

Alright folks, I'm off to ring in the new year, so a Happy New Year to all and let's hope for an even better MHQ in 2015.

>>37092488
Speaking from Navy experience, people can get away with a LOT of shit if it wasn't obviously done out of laziness or malfeasance. I've been caught sleeping on watch myself, and nothing came of it because everyone knew I had been up for thirty six hours helping get the RPFW coolers cleaned and my sleeping position involved me standing up with my logs in my arm and my hand on one of the 2CG instrument panel's readout knobs. It didn't even go up the chain, because the chief who found me had been helping with the same project and was touring around to hand out cans of Monster to the entire watchteam.

By comparison, we had a guy get kicked out for the same thing, except he had been up playing fucking Smash Bros and his sleeping posture was on top of 2CG's main box, lying the fuck down, being blatantly purposeful about being asleep.

>>37092836
>The alcohol, of course, came into play once again
Something just struck me. Alcohol shouldn't really do anything for reploids, should it? Isn't it nanites that makes them drunk?

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>>37092990
It's sort of assumed that they're liberally DNing anything they make.

You'll note this also makes the 6th's debacle even more blatantly offensive, because they boozified not-booze for no reason other than the sake of it.

>>37090761
> a holiday themed hostage situation


Now I have a beamsaber. Ho Ho Ho.

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>>37093119

"IT WAS JUST A JOKE, DUDE!"

"AYE HAVE NO FUCKS TO GIVE PAH RUM PUM PUM PUM"

>>37092836
>>Ninth?
Stealth unit, I'm fucking worried.

>>37093047
i guess giving people water/soda laced with nanites is illegal, huh? Damn.

>>37093047

Can they... add nanites... to anything?

Just, you know... anything?

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>>37093205
YEP.

>>37092937
When I was in the army one group went around our base, leaving post-it notes with "Knife kill" written on them on every sleeping recruit and officer one night. They where inspired by some story one of them read online. Only one of the guys was caught by the night watch after bed-time, so he was the only one who got any repercussion for it, even though most of us knew who did it.

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>>37093229

>>37093250

This is literally what Seal Team Six would do. Their job was to expose security holes in base security overseas. Unfortunately they did not do it in a diplomatic fashion. More like, they'd roar up to a motorcade on motorcycles and slap stickers on the window that would say "YOU ARE ONE DEAD NAVY ASSHOLE SIR" and then zoom off.

>>37093205
Pretty much, yeah

>>37093318
God, I'd try to get on Seal Team Six just so I could pull shit like that. That sounds fun as hell.

>>37093390
What's the Hunter equiv- oh, wait, every group in the Hunters is full of troublemakers. Never mind.

>>37093424
The hunter equivalent of Seal Team Six would probably be 0 Squad, wouldn't it?

>>37093424
I think the hunter equivalent of that would be The Ninth's responsibility.

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>>37092836
The Ninth... oh, now this was audacious.

Two Ninth Rangers snuck into a party for people much, much more important than they--the Weissritter's little high-society invite-only VIP bash--and after calmly chatting, schmoozing, and smoothing their way through a forest of celebrity-hunter elite (and elitist) shoulders, they promptly reached the food tables, stole the egg non, crystal bowl and all, and absconded. With it balanced on one palm over their heads, no less.

You actually have to stop here, in utter disbelief, pushing yourself away from your desk and turning your tired eyes skyward. When you look back, the pile hasn't disappeared in a little Christmas miracle of your own. Fumbling at it with massive fingers while trying not to look directly at it, you manage to peel the first page (handwritten, of course, and a Merry Christmas to you and your stuffed shirt, Halcyon) to examine the officious, furious Weissritter report.

"Halcyon... furious... threatened... retribution over... bowl," you mutter, only-half reading before you fling the paper away in disgust, sending it curling through the air ineffectually. "Bowl. Halcyon furious, threatened retribution over bOH FUCK ME WHY DO I HAVE TO DEAL WITH THESE PEOPLE," you roar to the heavens, feeling the room shake with your booming voice.

Well, the paperwork didn't flee in terror, and on the bright side, your predecessors had the forethought to soundproof this room, so there's that.

With your giant's shoulders slumping, you resume your place stooped over the reports. Halcyon is going to be insu--going to be EXTRA insufferable until he gets his pound of flesh. On the other hand, you kind of want to buy those Rangers Christmas cards.

>Send Halcyon a carefully (insulting) missive suggesting that he take the incursion as a lesson in security for the hunter elite.
>Diplomatic slap-on-the-wrist for the Rangers.
>Throw the book at the Rangers. They'll probably suffer less than if Halcyon's unsatisfied.
>Other?

>>37093499
>Send Halcyon a carefully (insulting) missive suggesting that he take the incursion as a lesson in security for the hunter elite.
>Diplomatic slap-on-the-wrist for the Rangers.

>>37093499
>Send Halcyon a carefully (insulting) missive suggesting that he take the incursion as a lesson in security for the hunter elite.
>Diplomatic slap-on-the-wrist for the Rangers.

Weissritter and company sound like assholes, send them a nice patronizing missive, then give a 'diplomatic' slap on the wrist to the offenders.

>>37093499
>Send Halcyon a carefully (insulting) missive suggesting that he take the incursion as a lesson in security for the hunter elite.

>>37093499
Ninth is amazing. I love them.
>insulting missive to Halcyon, and a wrist-slap for Rangers.

>>37093499
>Send Halcyon a carefully (insulting) missive suggesting that he take the incursion as lesson in security for the hunter elite.

And send the Rangers Christmas cards.

>>37093499
>Send Halcyon a carefully (insulting) missive suggesting that he take the incursion as a lesson in security for the hunter elite.
>Diplomatic slap-on-the-wrist for the Rangers.
just end it with something along the lines of "you are personally going to make sure that these two receive their just reward and that you hope the lessons in security we're beneficial in the long run"

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>>37093499
>>Send Halcyon a carefully (insulting) missive suggesting that he take the incursion as a lesson in security for the hunter elite.

We're the boss for a fucking reason. Even we have to pick our battles, it is true - but I have the feeling we've let this shitheel slide for far too long.

In case this fuckwank hasn't noticed, we're losing ground against the Mavericks. All it would take is one - ONE - suicide bomber wiping out a huge number of high-ranking, high-command Hunters to kick us in the nuts and cost us any momentum and initiative we might have. If he can't protect his own fucking HQ, what fucking good is he against Mavericks?

God, I'm getting mad as this wankrag just thinking about it.

>>37093318
Only thing I could say about the US military is that the goons we did traning excersises with where fuckin' scrubs. They seemed like they'd hardly held a gun before, never had a so lopsided combat simulation before.

>>37093499
Wait... What happened to the bowl?

>>37093630

*getting mad at

>>37093499
You know, you could always go with things like >>37093318
being something that the ninth should be doing in its off hours. Give them a slap on the wrist and tell them to return the bowl (if they haven't broken it, which they probably have) but how do you let two unidentified Reploids schmooze amongst hunter elite?

In fact, make it official that Ninth is now responsible for testing security like they did tonight and then spin that as their punishment to Halcyon. More duties, you know?

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>>37093647

>>37093671
Excellent. Also, changing my vote to the guy above you. Make it official.

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>>37093632
>US military

Found your problem. US Military is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get. Mainly because it's fucking huge. For every OPERATOR TIER OPERATOR, they need six forklift drivers to handle the logistics that keep them OPERATING OPERATIONALLY.

Consider, for example, the British armed forces. Their *entire armed forces* are smaller than the smallest branch of the US Military, the Marines. British soldiers are fucking top-notch professionals, because they can afford to be choosy. The US Military, not so much, because they need a lot of forklift drivers, and who freaking cares if they're too stupid to tie their shoelaces?

And we haven't even touched on National Guard units, who tend to have older people who are all Grown Up and have families and responsibilities and shit. They're in the odd place of having less training, equipment and support than regular enlisted, but they're often more professional because the "teen-twentysomething" retardo quotient is lower.

'Murricans, Man. 'Murricans.

>>37093499
Being Rhodes is suffering.

He's like the final evolution of the team dad

>>37093755
He's the team dad to all the other team dads.

>>37093632
>They seemed like they'd hardly held a gun before
Whaddafug, man. Even the Navy has pretty good pistol training in Basic, and that's crammed into two days. How does an actual boots-on-ground combat arm not train its assholes how to rifles?

>>37093714
That makes a lot of sense. Still kinda disappointing that the modern day war machine couldn't churn out something better for us to shoot at.

>>37093755
We need a team mom who lets us get away with shit.

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>>37093714
just as planned

>>37093714
If we don't know what we're doing the enemy sure as hell doesn't.

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>>37093812
>That makes a lot of sense. Still kinda disappointing that the modern day war machine couldn't churn out something better for us to shoot at.

That's because, at current, all of our best shooters are actually shooting at real enemies.

If you're lucky though, you might get to go on exercises with Aussies. Canadians are remarkably efficient and motivated, Brits are professional, crisp and precise in everything they do, and Aussies, well, Aussies are just ballin fucking insane. Just absolutely frothing-at-the-fucking-mouth insane. I hear catching a ride in one of their transports is either wonderful or terrifying, depending on how you feel about rollercoasters.

>>37093890
The Brits and Canadians were a lot of fun, never met with any Aussies in the army, but been drinking with a lot of them afterwards. The Finns I met were also pretty great.

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>>37094046
>Finns

In that case, you don't need to meet Aussies. You already know what Aussies are like. They're like 0.5 Finns.

>>37094083
Aussies are like surfer Finns

HC, who would we have to bribe to get Fullmettool registered as an official (non-combat) Hunter? Hypothetically.

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>>37094136
>Aussies are like surfer Finns

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>>37094249
When I figure it out, I'll let you know.

Alternately, me or Cain Labs.

Also, it always throws me how many servicemen read MHQ.

>>37094362
You do military humour pretty well.

>>37094677
That's pretty much what drew me in

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And god damn it, 4chan just ate an entire update. Stand by, reconstituting/drinking.

>>37094729
I just like stabby things. And explosions. And dick jokes.

>>37094768
>Not writing in a seperate text program

>>37094768
That was for the 10th, right? I thought there were only about two left, anyway, they die so fast.

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>>37094816
I did. The post went through, and then I got 'updating index.'

Oh well, lesson learned, don't delete it until I see it.

>>37094914
I'm actually about to start a game about the Tenth with a friend of mine! This is most excellent, I'd love to learn a little about them I don't just make shit up.

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>>37093499
Hell with it, you decide. If no Christmas miracle is going to grace you, you're just going to have to have your own fun. You tuck away the 9th's report for later, and give the offending Rangers the lightest punitive duty you can--together, of course, so they can share in their victory--and send them both a wry message suggesting that while their skills are impressive, they would be better served putting them to use against the enemy, rather than creating new ones. Your response to Halcyon can wait until later--you'll need something to look forward to, to get through all this.

Speaking of, the 10th's up next. You didn't think a unit reduced to all of two officers would be capable of bringing trouble to you, but you would be mistaken. Acting Commander Kinsley's been reported, this time, for making whiskey grenades. Again. The report is signed off on, hastily, by his unit-mate and sole subordinate, Husky Fencer. His normally precise writing is very clearly rushed--probably on his way out the door to meet that fiancee of his in the 2nd.

You can't really be bothered on this one. You write up a message to Kinsley directly, reminding him that as Acting Commander, his behavior reflects on himself, his unit, and the hunters as a whole. He'll just have to think of a proper punishment for himself, to submit for your approval by Monday. You fire off the email and eye your report pile. Over halfway through, now.

Which is good, because the 11th is up next.

>>37094977
That makes, what, the fourth or fifth MHQ game so far?

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>>37095020
You've been nursing a pet theory about the Eleventh Space Command, ever since you took office and had to begin dealing with Lieutenant India, Valkyrie Flight, and Astro Cygnus's bizarre, twisted sense of what passes for esprit de corps. He still won't replace that damned viewport no matter how hard you lean on him.

Something about that cold, yawning expanse of nothingness, with only so many new faces and only so many places to go, you think it drives them all batty. Hunter officers as a rule are fairly eccentric, but the Eleventh takes it to a new, horrifying level.

The commander's bizarre Stockholm syndrome love affair with his own tormentors aside, your lucky offender this year is actually a human hunter, one Alex Petrakis, who attempted to use a mass driver for an orbital present launch.

Again.

Damage estimates to the 11th watchtower hull are at 1.7 million zenny. ...Egh, whatever, dock him a pay grade. Next.

You notice that the 12th and 13th, and the 14th and 15th's incidents are paired.
>12th and 13th.
>14th and 15th.

>>37094914
I'm curious, what division would a wild-west style gunslinger with no other upgrade than a very powerful six-shooter fall into?

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>>37094821
Dan and Chris are just two guys as well, and they destroyed Canada.

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>>37095060
Depends on his skillset, durability, mobility, and so on. I could see him fitting the 9th's aesthetic.

>>37095020
What does the Tenth do again?

>>37095031
>>37095020
Well, atleast I got names. I was thinking I would play it a lot like a detective/super cop game. Solving stuff like Maverick serial killers in the cities, tracking and arresting them/putting them down.

>>37095093
Die.

>>37095117
Why do they have such a high fatality rate?

>>37095054
>12/13th

>>37095054
>>12th and 13th.
Tropical and Polar?

Well, at least this means that 13th hasn't shot down Santa and made off with his magic sack. Probably.

>>37095140
I think it's less high fatality, more zero new blood.

>>37095140
>"Tenth..." Em sighs. "Tenth isn't doin' much better than the Eighth right now. Last I heard they're down to two operatives, because they're hard as hell to reinforce. Tenth is Civic. "Zero-Collateral Combat". That's the opposite of Zero Collateral combat, they like to say. They work in urban environments, and they specialize in not causing any harm to infrastructure."

>>37095170
What's their specialty?

>>37095140
They're Zero Collateral Combat. They take down Mavericks while trying their damndest not to damage civilian infrastructure.

You can imagine how well that goes.

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>>37095093
10th is Special Forces (Civic), with a mandate that emphasizes avoiding collateral damage. They specialize in delicate combat situations around infrastructure, civilian life/property, and other places where you don't want a lot of crossfire.

They're currently in dire straits, as it's extremely difficult to train and arm a hunter for minimal environmental threat while still capable of engaging a maverick threat. Several ops in a row have gone badly for them, and they now only serve in an advisory role until additional operatives can be fielded.

>>37095060
How strong a gun? Also, is he sturdy, or anything like that?
Actually, what unit was Wallaby again? It might make sense.

>>37095187
Urban combat. Finding and removing enemies without doing damage to shit around them.

I was gunna try and do them in a detective noir feel.

>>37095204
How would you suggest doing a game about the Tenth, Command?

>>37095204
I think we were planning on learning non-lethal takedowns from them as well.

>>37095117
No, that's Eighth.

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>>37095220
I'm a bit tired, but if I remember right without double-checking, Wallaby was never a hunter formally, but an advisor/outside military vet who was helping to train hunter soldiers, including the 10th's.

>>37095226
I'd set it either later or earlier in the timeline, since right now there's very little flex available for you to work within.

>>37095253
It's both.

>>37095092
The only notable upgrades he has are built around drawing and shooting a revolver quickly and accurately, at inhuman speeds. Built for blending into a human crowd, identifying and taking out a target, then getting out.

Really though, the character isn't a megaman character, just a character I've been playing in one of my campaigns.

>>37095220
The gun was specially made for piercing any kind of bullet-proofing a rich civilian/dictator/business executive could reasonably buy. It won't pierce a tank, but it will pierce an armoured car (basically fires sabot rounds). Other than drawing and shooting it quickly, no other special skills.

Really, I was just curious where he would stand if transplanted into the megaman universe.

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>>37095422
That's a very tricky skillset that doesn't suit hunting too well. Possibly 9th, 4th, 2nd if he's sneaky, 1st if he's fast.

>>37095422
Rather low, and from that description, wouldn't really be working in Hunter ops. It's more like what Grach was made around, and they made him a walking death machine. If you upgraded to, say...something more likely to make swiss cheese out of a combat reploid gun wise, then you could make a potential 10th recruit. Perhaps as a prototype for an anti-mav guard, made to blend in. But...yeah, you honestly would need more going for you to really be more than grunt tier at best.

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>>37095158
>>37095150
No sense breaking the order now. You groan and turn to the regional units' mutual messup.

12th and 13th units were brought up together, mostly for a mass breakout of violence at their yearly exhibition games. Their unit rivalry is usually fairly friendly, but apparently 'tis the season for punching your fellow hunters in the mouth.

From what you can piece together, during one of the matches in the various sports the two units compete in, someone began to give out festive Santa hats to everyone involved, including both teams at halftime.

It became clear half an hour later that the hats were, in fact, tiny mechaniloids.

Tiny, biting mechaniloids.

Suddenly, with dozens of gnashing metal teeth on everybody's head, people began to panic. Someone accused someone else and it all spiraled into a massive fray.

Blizzard Wolfang is spending Christmas in a cell, having been witnessed by several victims as the originator of the hats. When questioned, his responses were "I have no comment on how totally worth it that was," and "I can only speculate as to how clever and handsome the perpetrator must be."

If you didn't know that he loved his job, you would think he hated his job.

As it stands, glowing accolades from his superiors and a sterling combat record speak for clemency, as do a few grudging admissions that death by santa hat was actually pretty funny, and no one was particularly slighted by being aggressively nibbled by a red and white fashion accessory/death machine.

A night in the clink and a warning not to try that again while you're in charge of the hunters will do for that.

>14th and 15th
>16th
>17th
>Special Unit 0

>>37095054
>12th and 13th.

As a random aside, I hope we get to see the enlisteds' forum again someday, if only to see their opinion of Anode and Em's bullshittery.

>>37095693
>14th and 15th

>>37095693
>14th and 15th
We may need to train under Bilzzard.

>>37095226
I'll ring in tomorrow with a lot of supplementary about the Tenth.

>>37095693
His every action is just another twist of the knife, knowing what happens to him.

>14th and 15th
Okay, now how the fuck did THIS work out?

>>37095693
>14th and 15th

>>37095781
HC, we can prevent him going Mav, right? ... Right?

>>37095753
Thanks, Cain Labs. I've got some ideas about a detective noir style, doing shit like taking maverick serial killers in cities and such.

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>>37095804

>>37095842
Boooooooo.

>>37095804
Really all depends if we can just so happen get stuck in the arctic when the shit that goes down to get him into that mess actually happens. Obviously.

>>37095804
I'm wary about changing the future. Feel like overstepping our bounds.

>>37095900
HC said in an early thread he wanted us to derail shit. Besides, what if one of our friends is meant to die 'canon'-wise?

>>37095900
Fuck that. It was clearly stated in thread one we were perfectly allowed to wreck canon, as we get stronger and more influential, we're fully expected to change things.

>>37095939
None of our friends are meant to be canon anything.

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>>37095974
Well, food for thought. By X5, Zero is supposedly the only space-piloting-trained hunter left alive.

>>37095753
Can we get some more on the Second too?

>>37095804
Your real priority is keeping Alia from assassinating him.

>>37095974
Blitz is canon, we'll probably meet more canon people, and I meant more if one of our friends is assigned to something we know (meta) will get them killed.

>>37095990
Nope, we're going to derail this HARD

hey HC, personal question, what hunter unit is YOUR favorite and why? just asking because I"m curious

>>37096019
Mission accepted.

>>37095990
Oh, well fuck canon then. Seriously, right in its ass.

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>>37096053
That's actually a pretty tough question. 4th's pretty near and dear to me for obvious reasons, most screentime, most development, etc. I guess beyond that it'd have to be the 11th. I've just had so much damn fun with them.

>>37096008
Don't see why not.

>>37096091
I love the 11th
>that picture
>>37095990
...huh

>>37095990
She might have retired to, uh. Raise... chickens.

Space chickens. Yep.

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>>37095727
>>37095749
>>37095781
>>37095795
This time, it looks like 15th Artillery caused the fireworks. Big surprise. This time, the entire unit--the ENTIRE UNIT--is facing reprimand, for deciding to discretely use another unit's roof as their bullseye for a game of super-long-range darts.

The 14th is joining them because they, upon catching wind of the situation, took it upon themselves to climb up to the target rooftop and kick the dud ordnance out of the air. Successfully, according to the damage reports from where the casings landed.

The 14th you can pardon, under the thinnest veneer of 'they meant well.' The 15th, though... you have half a mind to go hunt down Accel Orca and throw him to the wolves. Then again, you've already thrown the wolves into prison overnight.

For lack of other options, the necessity of heavy guns for your hunters doing their jobs, and that cursed seasonal mercy garbage, you're left with a punishment entirely too light for your tastes--you order Orca to formally apologize to the 3rd for dud-shelling their rooftop, pick up their mess, and then, as a group, play groundskeeper for the entire headquarters building for all of January.

You send him another General-to-Commander message, this one rather stronger-worded, letting him know in no uncertain terms what you think of his decisionmaking today, and suggesting he clean up his act.

Stupid.

Okay, home stretch. And, of course, it's the best and brightest, whose capacity for the worst and dumbest is unmatched in all the Maverick Hunters.
>16?

>>37096270
>16

>>37096270
>16?

What the fuck did they build this year?

>>37096270
Go for gold.

>>37096270
>16?
oh god yes

>>37096270
Which was the 16th?

>>37096398
Research and Development. Two words that make me very exited.

>>37096398
SCIENCE!

>>37096224
Or Anodes robo kids

God, I need sleep. Can't believe I'm going to miss out on Susan.
Night all, and a happy new year!

>>37096536
Roombas.

>>37096536
Well, you have to corrupt those young minds early, you know.

>>37096562
Happy New Year to you, Anon!

>>37096270
>16

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>>37096579

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>>37096562
The hell you are. I'm on the verge of passing out myself. Susan episode will have to take place tomorrow, or maybe even in a new thread.

>>37096682
We're already past bump limit, so likely new thread. See you tomorrow then, HC?

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>>37096306
>>37096308
>>37096318
>>37096346
R&D is responsible for an incredible amount of advancement in technology--maverick hunters are usually at the very forefront of new developments, or finding new applications for old standbys. When it comes to innovation or reinvention, you can't beat them.

Unfortunately, they also have a megalomaniacal evil genius thing going, sometimes, and you're pretty sure at least half to one-third of their projects are illegal. The ones you know about, anyway. You wouldn't be surprised if they didn't tell you half of what they're up to.

As for tonight, someone apparently bore out a grudge with a reindeer mechaniloid programmed to follow a colleague around shouting "YOU FUCKED UP" at regular intervals.

This is all well and good (and mind-witheringly dumb), but unfortunately in an attempt to gain some peace and quiet, the officer being chased left hunter base on leave, and went to the far end of the city.

The reindeer followed him, and it followed him in a straight line. The entire way there, it did not stop repeating its catchphrase. The end result is that it strafed the annual Carol of the Bells show in Geneva. Attached to the report is a recommendation from the publicity department suggesting a press release officially blaming the reindeer on mavericks.

You just... close your eyes, and put that report down. It can wait until the morning.

That leaves...
>17th Elite Unit
>Special Unit Zero

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>>37096788
Let's wrap this one up quickly.

Also, damn, autosage in less than twelve hours. You guys are the best.

As for tomorrow...I want to say "probably," but I can't fully commit. I can always run another holiday special soon--actual soon, not Hunter Command Soon--there's no shortage of them.

God, I love this story so much. I do have a question that I'm not sure if it was asked or got answered.

I believe I read somewhere that until the end of X3 Doctor Cain was the the leader of the Maverick Hunters as they were trying to find a suitable replacement for Sigma. Was what I read wrong/Did I just imagine the whole thing?

>>37096822
>17th
They're our best, and X usually keeps them in line, right? Let's handle them before... you know. Fukken Shinobis.

>>37096822
>17th
Gotta save the Shinobi for last.

>>37096822
>17th Elite Unit

>>37096822
>17th Elite

I will be legitimately surprised if whatever shenanigans they've caused will be anything more than noise complaints.

>>37096929
Er, I should be saying that I'd be surprised if their shenanigans didn't get them anything more severe than some noise complaints.

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>>37096889
Cain is never really directly in charge, though this being SNES games, they're never exactly full of exposition.

In MHQ, Cain is an intermediary between the hunters and the funding council of nations, which appoint representatives and provide oversight of the Hunters as a whole.

>>37096822
well at least the 18th unit hasn't caused problems.

Also 17th, let's see what blue boy's group got into today

>>37096822
>>17th Elite Unit
Part of me really wants X to be the problem, however slim those odds.

>>37096984
... Why do I get the mental image of X trying out some festive brews Zero got him for Christmas, and not even ten minutes later, he's running around the base sloshed as fuck, all armored up, and proclaiming himself "Champion Christmas".

>>37097092
>The strange thing about it all, there weren't even any nanites in them
>Placebo effect, or just another mystery of X's construction that no one will ever be able to figure out because he is that much of a fucking enigma?

>>37097092
Because he would have the X2 armor. That means as he's bashed around in a drunken stupor, he'll eventually blow up everything around in a flash of light. Probably yelling CHRISTMAS at the top of his lungs.

However, I don't think it would be festive brews per say.. just egg nog.

>>37097092
>>37097117
>>37097141
Fuck, that mental image nearly made me choke on my Dr. Pepper. Fuck you sirs for making me laugh so hard.

>>37097092
>"Champion of Christmas"

Maybe in a MMZ setting as Copy X. Dude was batshit insane enough to believe it in that series too!

Speaking of MMZ, has anyone tried to do a quest for those games yet? If not, would HC be cool with someone, meaning me, doing it? I know at one point he mentioned possibly going to that if things here went pear-shaped and Anode died/got retired. I figured it won't be too much of a problem, but I don't want to step on any toes either.

I'd also like to know if HC is coming up with some of his terms or if they are actually used and part of the supplementary material. Things like the High/Low Frequency beams and the LIFE cells are so believable that I can't actually tell. (This could just be me being dumb though.)

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>>37097181
I certainly can't make any claim to ownership of the series, so by all means, I'd love to see (and participate in) an MMZ quest. I've considered running a Neo Arcadia Quest myself someday, but that'd be some time off, I expect, if ever. So don't worry about competition--if you want it, go for it.

As for terms, the vast majority are things that Cain Labs or myself have cooked up, mostly Cain Labs. Some of them are actually existing terminology--DNA, for instance--made about ten thousand percent less stupid.

>>37097141
The history books record it as "The Christmas Rebellion" and it's gone down in the annuls of hunter legend as, quote, "the single greatest ass kicking the Hunters have ever received."

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>>37096900
>>37096924
>>37096926
>>37096929
>>37096984
You were amazed and dismayed to see the 17th on your disciplinary listing. Though, now that it's there, you're unsurprised to learn that X was involved.

Specifically, as a victim, as he tends to be when something like this comes up.

Every year like clockwork, Megaman X, the Father of all Reploids, the last son of Light, makes a basewide charity tour, dropping in on all the units while collecting toys, gifts, and donation drive collections to give to various charitable works around the city he's busied himself with.

Once again, the story involves a mechaniloid. This time, it was expertly disguised as a ride chaser. X jumped off the thing like it was on fire when it transformed.

Unfortunately, after it impacted the wall at speed, it WAS on fire. X got the donation goods away, and the fire suppression systems worked normally. The offending officer is currently cleaning up the foam. This one has a message from X himself reminding you of the time of year. Oh, you know, X, you think bitterly to yourself, eyeing the completed part of your paperwork. How well you know.

For X's tormentor, Neutron Zebra, you assign something a little more esoteric: Mall Santa duty for the next three years, during December. What's black and white and red all over now?

Last, and almost definitely not least, the Shinobi Unit.

And, dear God, did they try to be as stereotypical as possible?

One of your top-flight operatives, Quickblade Krill, was on leave after a particularly rough mission, spending his time in Japan, intending to report to the Japanese HQ afterward to return to duty. As all your little lost sheep/morons tend to do, he went bar-hopping first.

Somehow, despite routine hazard pay to the tune of six figures, the good Quickblade Krill did not have money when presented with a truly staggering tab.

So, being drunk, he did the only reasonable thing.

He threw a smoke bomb and dived out the window.

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>>37097567
Except 1: He missed the window, 2: hit the wall, 3: went THROUGH the wall, and 4: his smoke bomb left an unpleasant residue on the walls and ceiling of the bar.

Your incident report notes grimly that the writer received a call directly from the Japanese Hunter embassy. They made "noises," it reads, and they have chosen to interpret these noises as complaint.

Quickblade Krill, though executing his escape perfectly, had made the mistake of proudly boasting about his service in the hunters. Finding him was not difficult, and he's currently in civilian prison for vandalism. At least he had the good sense to surrender instead of actually attempt to resist. Maybe he'd sobered up by then.

In any case, someone just bought someone else a new bar renovation. You leave a note for your accounting representative to dock as much pay from Krill's check as you are legally allowed. He can make an apology--not in writing, in person--and then you can march him into your office and ask him how he feels about his representation of the most elite cadre in the active hunting units.

You look up from your bloody work at a knock on the door. After a moment to push the papers away in tired disgust, you bid them enter. In comes X, as is his custom--you'd nearly forgotten you're the last stop on his basewide tour every year.

"Sir," he says--a moment before eyeing the stack of reports. "Busy day?" You glare at him in silence by way of answer. "Ah."

"Was there something you needed, Commander?" you ask.

"No, sir, just my usual."

You grunt in affirmation. He knows you well enough by now not to be put off. As you neaten your desk, he produces a small wrapped bottle (egg nog, non-alcoholic and made local) and a glass (the boy managed to befriend a glassmaker in the city one day, and he's made a habit of buying gifts from her shop).

"Care for a glass?" you finally ask, breaking a minute-long silence as you look back up at him.

>>37097567
Fucking shinobi, always trying to get out of paying their tabs...

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>>37097586
He smiles in that disgustingly authentic way of his. "No, thank you, sir. I just wanted to pay my respects and drop these off. I have to get back to base, and, er..."

"...And help Neutron Zebra clean up the mess he made for himself," you finish for him. He rests a hand on the back of his helmet and chuckles sheepishly. Yes, you thought so. "Very well, Commander. Thank you."

"Just as long as you haven't gotten tired of them yet," X replies, only a faint hint of worry on his tone.

You look up at him again. Of all hunters--of anyone, really--X is probably the closest thing you have to a real friend. You have acquaintances, of course, partners, something of a protégé in Rama, but no real friends. But with X, there was something there, an earnest respect for you not just as authority or force, but as an individual. Sometimes you look down at him--nearly half your height, mild and friendly and polite to a fault, with his heart on his sleeve--and you feel this strange since of vertigo, like you're staring down a cliff. You have to remind yourself, sometimes--this is the Reploid who defeated Sigma. This is the one you were all templated from. And here he is, giving you fancy glassware and sugary drinks.

It's all so unreal.

He blinks. "Sir?"

You wave off his concerns as you sit back in your chair heavily. "Just the paperwork catching up to me, Commander. No, I certainly haven't gotten tired of them."

You can practically see the relief wash over him at that. "Ah. Excellent. Good night, sir. Get some rest. It's Christmas, after all."

"So it is. Thank you, Commander. Good night."

X closes the door, leaving you back in your silence, with nothing but forms for company again.

He's right, though, it is Christmas. And though you'd never let anyone know it, you do have one indulgence.